Yellow Lamborghini on Beach Road / and Spastic Trip Report
This guy parks his yellow lamborghini on beach road at opportunistic times and must be a player. I changed my approach to the night ladies of coconut bar by asking them "do you want to go with me in my car? - while pointing to it. " Of course only the pointing was communicated but whatever. Call me jealous. But I am truly honored that someone who has the big bucks prefers to walk on beach road at night.
Other observations of my past month here: NightWish Group on Soy 6 - my strategy was to stay away from all of them this trip. And boy was I wrong!! Ended up being Soy 6 saved my entire holiday since they are PROFESSIONALLY run and in my opinion Consistent. Big FUCK YOU to the staff at Wild Things Bar - "Wild Things Bar" Soy 6 - next to The Corner Bar and HollyWood. This is a clip joint. Worst experience ever. I made the same mistake by being forced in and slammed lady drinks. I was drunk. But remembered from video's this place was suppose to be cool. I might be stupid drunk but I remember how I am treated. And so off to Real Soy 6 bars I went along with my Baht. I was the only customer both times and the 2 ladies drank as fast as a Tijuana hooker in HK / Adilitas does. Never will I enter their premises. Very shady. Out 2 K Baht in under 4 minutes. Ok now the good stuff!
HollyWood Bar, Mods Bar, Red Point, Where Angels Fly? NW Group. Very very good experiences. While Drunk, sober or in-between. I am happy to buy lady drinks in moderation. And then consider the up-sell. Good atmosphere too. Red Point's rooms upstairs were Nice!
BBFS CIP. The most important thing for me. Still not easy or offered up front much but still obtainable.
Met some guys who insisted I go to Kink. Told them I am not into the big glamourous bars. Much preferer open bars- said I would love it. Well I went to Kink alone. Not knowing about upstairs until I left. Then came back and went upstairs in Kink and I see why a lot of guys would like to see pussy fingering shows and a touchy feelie bath shower setup. Just not for me. Give me Soy 6 and BeachRoad at night.
Russians are Coming! So many Russians in Pattaya now! Must be due to the wars?
Hemingways has good Pasta.
Who is the Psychotic Woman, 35 +/- short hair on a Bike who yells and screams at the massage places on Soy Honey Every morning? Is this a religious Repent / sinner expression? I am for sure you guys who are there now also see AND HEAR her. Just curious:
Went to Billabong and the LK Metro outside bars and Rock Factory to chill and recover after Soy 6 - good strategy.
Soy 7 - man these ladies got hit by the ugly stick WTF happened to Hedonism? - Hook Up Corner was okay for a few drinks.
Maggy Mays. Sorry couldn't do it. That area on pothole smells bad and I didn't get a good vibe.
Dressing well. Long sleeved collared shirt and Smiling like a game show host. I tried this strategy and fuckk me jebus. Yes it marginally works. Especially on Beach Road. Met a nice sales lady from a mall who was recently fired. We discussed business, using google translate and cosmetics. She wants to open a shop. Of course my lessons mean more boom boom as it turned a short time from beach road into a long time multiple pop day. But I think dressing well. Which someone else noted here. Does seem to work!
I said NO! To Indian Tailored Suits, horoscope. Lottery, Rolex Watches, bracelets, and especially condoms.
This trip Soy 6 was the clear winner -.
CRAZY STORY FROM CRAZY PATTAYA (PART 1 of 2)
I am not a Pattaya newbie. I have visited most of the agogos in Walking Street and LK Metro. But I usually drink on my own and buy a few lady drinks here and there and go back to my room and sleep alone. So I have very little barfine experience. Maybe then, that does make me a newbie.
This happened towards the end of last year, year 2022, when there were no restrictions to enter Thailand. Did I get scammed by the mamasan on the second day? Hell yeah, I did.
Here it goes. I'm on Day 6 of my 7-Day trip to Pattaya. I've had zero boom boom this trip. Since I've made it so far, I might as well make it 7 days no boom boom. Around 10 pm of Day 6, I end up in an obscure alley. I see a few hotties standing outside. I'm thinking let's check out the talent inside. There is a stage in the middle of this small bar, but there are only 3 girls dancing on the stage. To me, that is not an agogo. Maybe it's a hybrid bar. I'm looking to my left watching a girl at the end of the stage. As my turn my head slowly to the right, I realize there are two people standing in front of me, a little to my right. One of them is the mamasan, and she points to the girl standing next to her. Standing in front of me is a very pretty young girl, very slim and white-skinned, just how I like them. But she looks very young, maybe too young. She reminds me of the K-POP or J-POP idol members. She might be ethnically Chinese since her skin is so white. I motion her to sit next to me and she does so. I will call the girl Panda. Now, it looks like I won't make it to Day 7 no boom boom.
I ask Panda one or two questions in English and each time she replies in Thai. Great. She speaks zero English and I have no idea what she is saying. I whip out my cellphone and open the translate app. I phrase the question so that she can just answer yes or no because her cellphone is probably in her locker.
"Can you go barfine longtime?" "Yes".
"How much is the barfine?" No answer.
"Is 2 boom boom ok?" "Yes. ".
"Until what time can you stay?" (I show her my watch. She points to 6 o'clock. 6 am.).
"How old are you?" (She motions a two and a zero.).
"How much money for you?" "3,000 baht" (This she can say in English.).
A little red flag is raised in my head. While 3,000 Baht sounds reasonable for longtime, I do not believe that the mamasan will let this beautiful girl fresh from the province go for 3,000 Baht. I ask the girl one more important question.
"Do you have a Thai national ID card?" "No. ".
That is just fantastic. I have a young Thai girl fresh from the province who speaks zero English and she cannot prove her age or identity. So I might make it to Day 7 no boom boom after all. In the past, I would have given up right then and there. But nowadays, I am more persistent. The saying, "Where there is a will, there is a way. " actually works if you adopt it and truly believe in it.
I call the mamasan and ask how much for the girl longtime. She says 2,000 Baht barfine and 5,000 baht for the girl. That's what I suspected all along. I tell the mamasan the girl has no ID card. The mamasan is surprised and says, "Then you no longtime. You go upstairs shorttime. " WTF. I tell the mamasan, "It's ok. I longtime her. " The mamasan is surprised again. She must think I'm crazy.
But now, I'm fucked. I went from just having a relaxing beer to barfining a girl longtime. No English. No ID card. How am I going to get her into my hotel room? My hotel is very strict about the ID policy.
The mamasan calls the waiter over and the waiter writes on the back of the bill. 2,000 barfine + 5,000 for the girl + about 500 for drinks. Total about 7,500 Baht upfront. I say, "Hell no. I will pay for the barfine and the drinks now. I will give her 5,000 Baht in the hotel after boom boom. " They are not happy. The mamasan asks the girl if it's ok with her. Many deadbeats in Pattaya. I'm not one of them, but they do not know me. The girl says ok. The mamasan is surprised for the third time this night.
So the girl Panda changes into her outside clothes and we leave the bar. Outside her co-workers are stunned to see her get barfined. Then, it hits me. Yes, I'm slow. This is Panda's first day at work and I'm her first ever barfine. That is why Panda knows nothing about the rates. And the mamasan has no idea Panda does not have a Thai national ID card.
Now, Panda has her cellphone in her hand. I ask her again her age because to me she looks borderline illegal. Now, she says she's 19 years old. Ha! I knew it. So the mamasan probably told her to lie about her age. Many guys balk when they hear the girl's age is something-teen.
We go to get a late night meal first. Of course, she is texting someone. I'm facing the entrance to the restaurant and I see a ladyboy standing outside. And he is staring at us. Panda says, "Wait" She heads over to the ladyboy. They talk a little. Maybe Panda gives the ladyboy something like money or house keys. Panda returns a minute later. I don't bother to ask. I don't want to know. I just want to fuck her tonight. Like Enrique Iglesias sings, "Tonight, I'm fucking you. ".
I ask Panda about her ID card again. Then she shows me what looks like a student ID card from her handbag. I check the date of birth on the card. WTF! It says she is born in year 2004. It's now end of year 2022 past her birthday. That means according to her ID card, she is 18 years old. WTF! I barfined a Thai girl who becomes younger by one year every thirty minutes. In another thirty minutes, she's going to be 17 years old. Now, I'm really fucked!
I remember in 2019 before Covid. I was in Windmill Club. And the waitress was trying to pimp out her younger sister who also looked very young and spoke no English. I asked the waitress how old she is. She says her sister is 19. I ask is 19 ok? She says 19 is ok. 18 no ok. That is what she said at the time.
Outside the restaurant, Panda keeps saying, "Passport. Passport. " I ask her, "Do you have a passport?" The passport issued by the Thai government should sort out this mess for once and for all. I check the DOB on the passport. WTF! It also says she is born in year 2004. So she really is 18 years old. But Panda keeps insisting that the student ID and the passport are both wrong. She says she is born in year 2003, which would make her 19. Now, I'm fucked big time. I consider taking her back to her bar, or shop, as they like to say. How can the passport be wrong? Could it be a fake passport? I hear Bangkok is the mecca of fake ID's and documents.
As we are walking back to my hotel, I'm formulating a devious plan in my head. Bribe the security guard 500 Baht. Have him distract or make the front desk lady leave the desk. And Panda and I sneak in quietly. I have my room key with me so I do not need the front desk lady's help. I don't think the front desk lady is bendable. She might be bendable in other ways, if you get my drift.
I change my mind about the bribery and I say, "Fuck it. Let's just use her passport. " Panda and I walk straight up to the front desk. I give the front desk lady Panda's passport. She actually gives me a mischievous smile. I think she is surprised that I bring a girl to my room. She takes the passport but doesn't even open it and just says good night.
Now, I'm happy and worried at the same time. Maybe I'll get to fuck Panda tonight. But I kind of wanted the front desk lady to stop me in my tracks and yell, "You NO fuck 18 year old Thai girl tonight! You crazy? You want to go Thai prison?
After shower, Panda and I are both lying on the bed. I tell her I want a blowjob. She complies. Her blowjob is pretty good. Better than some of the 25 year old bargirls. (Later, I would get the idea that the ladyboy taught her how to give head. Maybe Panda even practices it on the ladyboy every night.) Panda says, "Condom. " Don't worry baby. I always use condom.
I put the condom on and take a look at her pussy. Her shaven pussy looks so small. I don't think I can get it in. And I'm not a big guy. I get it about halfway in. After a few thrusts, my dick comes out. I can't get it in all the way. I've had 19 year old girls before. But none of them had a pussy this tiny and this tight. Panda is still growing physically. After two years of daily barfines and further physical growth, her pussy won't be that tiny and tight anymore. I try to get it in again. This time I use more force. Panda moans a little half in pain, half in pleasure. Now, it's all the way in. I get on top of her chest to chest and starting pumping away. By now, the front desk lady would have opened Panda's passport and seen that Panda is only 18 years old. She is going to call the police. And while my pecker is embedded deep inside her pussy pounding away, the SWAT team from the Royal Thai Police is going to smashed the door in without warning. The point SWAT member is going to shoot me in the ass with a rubber pellet. (Well, it better be a rubber pellet, rather than real ammo.) And off I go to the Bangkok Hilton for the next ten years. Thank you mamasan for making me Jeffrey Epstein for the night. I'm not into the Jeffrey Epstein thing. But I get it. It feels like fucking a virgin. The tiny and tight hairless pussy that resists penetration, with the potential tabooness and all. (Is tabooness a word?) Like I said, it's my first boom boom of this trip so I do not last long. The tight pussy probably helped as well. I go to the shower and wash off. We say good night and doze off for a few hours.
As I awake, I see that Panda is not sleeping and just looking at me. Time for boom boom number 2? I think she read my mind. Panda immediately grabs my cock and it becomes hard right away. I put a condom on and try to enter her again. Again, I have trouble entering her. It goes halfway in and a few seconds later comes out again. After three or four tries, I manage to get it in. Unfortunately, I can never come twice in one night. I don't get to fuck very often. So whenever I get the chance to fuck, I fuck too hard and I end up with pelvic pain. So after about 20 minutes of pounding, I stop. It hurts. Although I do not come, for me, it is one of the best fucks ever.
It's almost 6 am. Time for Panda to go home. I want her to go also. I like getting breakfast alone early at 7 am. I walk her to her room on Soi Buakhao. It is not far from my hotel. Outside her door, I probably make a fatal mistake. I tell her to wait for me tonight. She nods a yes. Almost 100% of the communication is done via google translate.
TO BE CONTINUED in PART 2.
