Bangkok Reports

Kumbu,

I really enjoyed the reports; however.

"Scooby Doo: Yabadabadoooooooooo"

Surely you realize you have integrated Fred Flintstone's battle cry with scooby doo. What I think you meant to say was:

Scooby Doo: Scooby-dooby-doo

Thanks!

star of light...star of love...ICEBERG, GOLDBERG...what's the difference??

Right you are Silom. Actually, I had not realized that - what an idiot I am, I need to brush up on my childhood cartoons. But upon consideration, I've decided to keep it as is. Call it artistic license. It somehow sounds better to my ear to have Scooby Doo saying Yabadabadoo. [QUOTE=Silom]
"Scooby Doo: Yabadabadoooooooooo"

Surely you realize you have integrated Fred Flintstone's battle cry with scooby doo. What I think you meant to say was:

Scooby Doo: Scooby-dooby-doo

Thanks![/QUOTE]

Ah yes, the coffee jizz. That is the highest of praise - thanks![QUOTE=David_33]Another excellent report Kumbu, but I shouldn´t have tried to read it while drinking coffee. I laughed so hard I suffered a coffee nose ejaculation.[/QUOTE]

Heloo there fellow mongers.

I will be headed to BKK on the second trip very soon.

This time however I would like to soend my time with white women. Russian or Uzbek women or the kind.

Can anynody tell me a specific place to get my hands on what I am looking for and then take them back to my hotel room? Please!

Thanks,

Tarzaan

in the morning, as i struggled with the gripes and the cramping, i was transported back into the first grade. i heard the song we all used to sing on such occasions. as it repeated in my head, i clenched my jaw, an almighty scowl across my face, and the words began to growl from my contorted mouth.

when you're sliding into first...
and you feel something burst...
diarrhea, diarrhea.

what had i eaten the night before? one of the girls at the office had brought me a 'special' barbecue chicken, maybe that was it? or maybe it was the khao pad kay i had on the way home? or maybe it was the terrible ball crushing i endured two nights earlier under the pounding brick house ass? whatever the cause, it was putting a serious cramper on my plans for tonight. i was planning on a road trip down to pattaya – my last one of this trip, and who knows how i could endure a 2.5 hour bus ride in this condition? and the road trip would be preceded by a pretty tough day at work – running back and forth to the toilet isn't the best way to conserve energy for the planned fucking frenzy in pattaya. interesting that i was worried about how the diarrhea would affect the road trip and work, but not in the the slightest bit worried about brown dribble from my ass as i plowed a thai lovely down in patts.

when it comes out of your bum...
like a bullet from a gun...
diarrhea, diarrhea

the timing of this in a sense sucks, but in a sense it's not too bad. i've gone a whole month of complete and utter debauchery without so much as a sniffle. so that is the good news. but now this, and the bad news is that it's when i'm coming in to the closing stretch. i am actually past the bend and i'm into the last 50 meters, but that damned kenyan is closing in on me, and i need a final kick to get me past the finish line. the finish line, by the way, is tuesday night – that is when i bid adieu to this wonderful country and this wonderful month-long experience. that is also when i will bid farewell to you, fellow isgers.

so as you might have predicted, i called the road trip off. i decided to stick around bkk for an extra night, then travel down to pattaya on friday night. i called old buzooms from the other night – the girl who stuck her fingers up my butt. she certainly couldn't do that tonight, or else she would not only get some choco-fingers, but she might open up the spigot, if you know what i mean. actually, i sent her an sms asking if she could come by after work, and she agreed.

she arrived promptly at the agreed hour (6pm), i mean literally to the minute. she was dressed in a purple one-piece dress.

i offered her a drink, and we got to chatting again, which lasted 20 minutes or so. during this time, i was feeling a little ass-challenged in that i was feeling like a bout of the brown dribbly might be on its way. that would not be pleasant, to be sure. but that was all suddenly shoved into the background when she reveals that she brought her old cell phone with her. this was an interesting development because the last time i saw her, she told me about how when she gave her old cell phone in for repair, it came back with a new memory card, and on it was a stash of someone's home-made porno movies. this was some american dude who shot all his sex scenes with his cell phone – hah! anyway, there was one movie that she said she masturbates to four to five times a week when she wakes up, and she brought the phone so i could watch it.

yowza. she showed it to me and ran off to shower. the movie was pretty cool – clearly amateurish, but pretty good. it was 9 minutes of over-the-top screaming by the girl, lots of action, boobs jiggling left and right, lots of action from a single camera angle. the guy starts out eating this girl's pussy as she whimpers 'oooh yeah, right there, more of that', etc. then he fingers her pussy during daty, then sex, then anal sex, then he pulls out and ejaculates all over the girls boobs. right, you can see where the night is heading, right? i figured this was the plan that she was asking me to execute, or else why would she have shown me the porno?

she comes out, i go in and shower, and upon returning, i find her on the couch reading a magazine. i gently coax her into the bedroom and start to wax poetic about how beautiful she is, what wonderful legs she has, what sexy eyes she has, blah blah blah. she falls for it (or at least plays along), and the towel comes off. yummy. her breasts are truly magnificent. they are large, firm, real, and perfectly shaped. the girl is a total face and body double for veronika zemanova, if you know who that is. so i worship at the alter of mammary for a while, kissing, nuzzling, and doing those large, lift/squeezes of her breasts (lots of fun). i then make my way down to daty. as i apply my tongue pressure, i am trying to emulate the guy in the video, but it isn't working. trying to do it to his pace is fucking up my own rhythm, so i give up on that after a few minutes and go back to my own way of doing things. this pays dividends pretty soon with a small, rather inconsequential orgasm. as inconsequential as it seemed, she was super-sensitive afterwards, so i had to pull back and let her relax.

we talked for a while, and then we showered together to try to get the juices flowing once more. when we got out, she said to me:
buzooms: you make me liquid, i want to make you liquid.
kumbu: whaaaaaa?
buzooms: you make me liquid, i want to make you liquid.
kumbu: i'm sorry, one more time?
buzooms: you make me liquid, i want to make you liquid.
kumbu: ...
buzooms: you...make...me...liquid...i...want...to...make...you...liquid.
kumbu: yes...it's...not...the...speed...of...what...you...are...saying, it is the particular combination of words you are using which is confusing me.

i thought 'ah fuck it', and i pushed her head down and pulled her ass up and started to tongue her pussy from behind. she did not fight it, and rather enjoyed it i must say. my goal really was to try to tongue her ass a little so as to gauge the viability of an assault on the rear-guard tonight. i had just had anal two nights earlier, but it seems it might be on the menu once more.

so i slowly move my tongue to that ribbon of flesh between the pussy and asshole, careful to watch for signs of objection – and none arrived. so i moved my tongue over to her asshole and gently peppered kisses around the hole (not on the hole itself). once again, no sign of objection. so in i went – tongue to asshole, just like the pervs like it. she did not object. i did this for a few minutes, and was sure to leave a whole lot of spit in the hole before i pulled back.

i slapped on my last trojan and she pulled out a bottle of lubricant – again, a blue bottle of durex lubricant – the same as the batshit girl two nights earlier. so i glob up little kumbu and i am about to stick it into her butt when she figures this out and she yelps her protest. i am a little surprised, but then i remember the video: the guy does the girl in missionary first, then doggie, then back to missionary, at which point he does anal. so i was fucking up the order of events. what a dufus i can be sometimes.

so i did as the script dictated. we did missionary for a while, then into doggie, which i had to fight hard to avoid coming. when we got back into missionary, i was relieved, and i put all my powers of seduction into her at that point. i worked hard, and very soon afterwards, i got my reward with a more sustained, measurably more intense orgasm. this time she was less sensitive afterwards, and she lifts up her hips, offering me the asshole. just like the script dictates. so i enter her slowly, and it is tough going. in that position – lying flat on the bed, hips lifted off the bed, the girl tends to tighten her muscles in her back so as to lift the hips up. this tends to tighten the asshole muscles too, and so entry was quite difficult. but i eventually got there, and i was able to pull off quite a few rhythmic strokes before i felt the orgasm arriving. before it got too close, i pulled out and breathed a moment to let the orgasm dissipate slightly. meanwhile, she flipped over onto all fours, and we got into the real animal sex act. i entered her from behind and ontop – i was half-squatting and kind of half-standing above her entering her ass from behind. this is a classic porn stance, and it is surprisingly hard on the legs. you have to keep yourself in that semi-crouched position, lifting up and down with the thigh muscles, which is a tough thing to do for a long time.

thankfully this was doggie style anal sex, and so i did not have to wait all that long before the orgasm began to arise. i was trying to judge the timing so i could pull out, rip off the condom and ejaculate onto her boobs, as per the video. i began to feel the orgasm, so i pulled out quickly. the problem was that i pulled out so quickly, the final little snag on the tight anal sphincter was enough to send me over the top. so by the time the condom was off and she had flipped over, my first shot was already out of the gun. and you all know the first shot is the power shot, the rest is basically just a dribble (given the constant sex i've endured over the last month or so). so the actual cum shot was not all that great, although i did get enough of my stuff onto her to get a good groan out of her. fun stuff. so yes, oscar, i finally creamed those tatas, just as you suggested in your pm to me.

we talked for a while afterwards. she was pleased that i executed her plan so well - she said she would remember it. i suggested that next time we should make our own version of the movie...wink-wink? she laughed and gave a nonresponse, so that's a negative. i told her about this one gogo girl from pattaya who has been stalking me, and she laughed at that (i'll post something on that soon, once things are resolved a little), and she told me about all her sex partners, her kik, her experiences at cm2 and spasso, etc. i then felt my sphincter tighten up trying to keep my bowels within me, so i quickly dismissed her. i faked a phone call (i pretended my phone was on buzz, answered it and told the phantom on the other end that i would 'get it done immediately.'). childish, i certainly admit, but diarrhea cannot be argued with. so she left and i crapped pathetically.

funny how before and after the sex, my bowels were in charge of me, but during sex, i did not even think about it. anyway, i am glad to report that the problem cleared up over night, and i went on to pattaya a day late. but i made up for that lost day with one of the most superb tantric experiences i have ever had. you shall read about it soon, my friends.

[QUOTE=D Cups]Liquid = lubricant. Got it.[/QUOTE]Actually, not sure about that. I think what she was trying to say was that I got her wet, and now it was time for me to ejaculate. Liquid = ejaculate. But I could be wrong - as you see, I did not have the patience to get a real explanation.

"What had I eaten the night before?"
"I poked my tongue into her asshole and murmered “mm-hmm”."

May have been the culprit.....the timing is right.

Damn it, you may be right. I thought about that too, and all I can say is that such a potential connection did not dissuade me from repeating this behavior on Friday and Saturday nights. Talk about obsessed.
[QUOTE=David_33]"What had I eaten the night before?"
"I poked my tongue into her asshole and murmered “mm-hmm”."

May have been the culprit.....the timing is right.[/QUOTE]

"that is when I bid adieu to this wonderful country and this wonderful month-long experience. That is also when I will bid farewell to you, fellow ISGers."

hope you're not stopping your reports....

fingers crossed for au revoir......

Thanks for your imput Kumbu....

V

Scooby also says "ROTS-A-RUCK" :)

[QUOTE=Kumbu]Actually, not sure about that. I think what she was trying to say was that I got her wet, and now it was time for me to ejaculate. Liquid = ejaculate. But I could be wrong - as you see, I did not have the patience to get a real explanation.[/QUOTE]
To me means liquid = wet = cum...:)
all happy now? I think Kumbu veeeery happy!

[QUOTE=Kumbu]When you're sliding into first.

And you feel something burst.

Diarrhea, diarrhea.

When it comes out of your bum.

Like a bullet from a gun.

Diarrhea, diarrhea[/QUOTE]People think it's funn.

But it's really dark and runny.

:P

Kumbu,

Why don't you give the names of the girls?

[QUOTE=Bionicman]To me means liquid = wet = cum...:)
all happy now? I think Kumbu veeeery happy![/QUOTE]

She wanted Kumbu's liquid. I think she was trying to say she did not want him to use his last Trojan!