Cartagena Reports

[QUOTE=UnknownGuy;2600708]Thanks for the info. You damn right he going to walk inside by himself. I'm going to wait for him outside taking numbers. Some people have to learn the hard way.

BTW, your trip past were legendary. Thanks for all that. I knew about a lot of what you mentioned but I didn't know about the lemonade. Not that I tried it, but one restaurant served agua de Panela (sugar cane water) that they make and I would drink it every morning. Had runs every morning and had no idea why. I thought it was the mangos I ate every morning. Now I know why. I'll buy the sugar cane cubes myself and make it myself like I do at home now.

One more question, I assume you stayed in El Centro for your trip. Where is that bank you used that had the 900 mil limit? Across the street on Venezuela Ave?[/QUOTE]Its also the Ice in the drinks. Many make the ice with tap water and if the travelers stomach is not accustom to the water, when that ice starts to melt in the drink its time to spend some time on the toilet. The only time I would take a drink with ice is when alcohol was in there.

Yes, that's the one, across from Centro Uno in that triangle shaped area before the multi level Exito is on Venezuela Ave.

The machine on the right was the one with the 900 mil limit, the one one the left didn't work for me.

It gives a better rate than exchanging currency at the cambio but then depending on your bank, your bank may hit you with a ATM transaction fee of $10+ per transaction so it can add up quickly.

Scotiabank has no fees find a Scotiabank.

[QUOTE=UnknownGuy;2600708]Thanks for the info. You damn right he going to walk inside by himself. I'm going to wait for him outside taking numbers. Some people have to learn the hard way.

BTW, your trip past were legendary. Thanks for all that. I knew about a lot of what you mentioned but I didn't know about the lemonade. Not that I tried it, but one restaurant served agua de Panela (sugar cane water) that they make and I would drink it every morning. Had runs every morning and had no idea why. I thought it was the mangos I ate every morning. Now I know why. I'll buy the sugar cane cubes myself and make it myself like I do at home now.

One more question, I assume you stayed in El Centro for your trip. Where is that bank you used that had the 900 mil limit? Across the street on Venezuela Ave?[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=UnknownGuy;2600708]but one restaurant served agua de Panela (sugar cane water) that they make and I would drink it every morning. Had runs every morning and had no idea why. [/QUOTE]As Nypher said, your gut is not used to the local bacteria. You should always keep probiotic in your toiletry kit with your other medicines. You can find it at Walmart or your local pharmacy over the counter.

[QUOTE=MrEnternational;2600902]As Nypher said, your gut is not used to the local bacteria. You should always keep probiotic in your toiletry kit with your other medicines. You can find it at Walmart or your local pharmacy over the counter.[/QUOTE]Yep. Started taking my probiotics a few weeks ago. I'll be good by my next trip.

[QUOTE=Kafka;2600898]Scotiabank has no fees find a Scotiabank.[/QUOTE]Good looking thanks.

[QUOTE=Nypher;2600839]Its also the Ice in the drinks. Many make the ice with tap water and if the travelers stomach is not accustom to the water, when that ice starts to melt in the drink its time to spend some time on the toilet. The only time I would take a drink with ice is when alcohol was in there.

Yes, that's the one, across from Centro Uno in that triangle shaped area before the multi level Exito is on Venezuela Ave.

The machine on the right was the one with the 900 mil limit, the one one the left didn't work for me.

It gives a better rate than exchanging currency at the cambio but then depending on your bank, your bank may hit you with a ATM transaction fee of $10+ per transaction so it can add up quickly.[/QUOTE]Thanks again.

[QUOTE=Kafka;2600898]Scotiabank has no fees find a Scotiabank.[/QUOTE]That bank is a Scotiabank and you are correct they do not charge. However, the mongers bank may charge them depending on who their bank is.

For example: Chase charged me $2.50 for using an non Chase ATM + $5 for withdrawing foreign money + 3% for the foreign exchange fee which came out to around $11 per transaction.

The lowest fee bank I've found is TD bank at $3 but hardly any branches in my local area to persuade me to open an account unlike Chase or Bank of America who are practically on every street corner like Walgreens and CVS. Jajajaja.

Seems so hard to get good answer, I think I watched every video on youtube and called 15 locations, like talking to the wall. Trying to find a nice hotel or Apartment near Dolce Vita that is visitor friendly. The Cova House Cartagena looks very nice but cannot get a response from property manager. I need at least 2 bedrooms. Looked at Hotel El Viajero and it seems guest friendly, but not as nice as I would like. I do not want to travel to BocaGrande. If anybody has any good recommendations for a $75 to $150 per night rooms within a few minute walk of Dolce Vita for this coming weekend. I want clean bed, hot water, water pressure, AC, safe in room, clean bathroom, locking doors. I stayed a 2 months ago at an Airbnb which was not my favorite. Thanks in advance.

My first post didn't post. I'm looking for something like the old Del Rey or Presidente in Costa Rica, or Castillo in Medellin. Some that has hot water, AC, a safe, 2 bedrooms, clean beds. Hotel or AirBnB, preferably within a few minute walk of Dolce Vita. Hotel El Viajero looks okay but would prefer something nicer, hard to confirm with anyone if it visitor friendly. Any help would be greatly appreciated. I'm going the 10-12th of September.

Further to my most recent post, I promised a trip report. I thought you might be interested in hearing of my misadventures. This rapidly became the holiday in hell.

I won't bore you with all the problems I had trying to book this, but between my bank, the credit card co, and Colombian bureaucracy, I should have taken the hint, that this was never going to end well.

So I finally arrive in Colombia and on my first night, I meet one of the very few natives, Angela who can speak English. I have a plan which usually works very well in TH. Try to find one girl to "wife up for the duration" I am offering 1800 USD ($65 per night = 250000 Colombian pesos) plus daily shopping trips for about another (100 k per day) $850 in total as well as random acts of generosity. Angela is interested.

She just about passes the probationary period. Then she starts to claim that I had promised her $250 USD per night. If I did, then you might wonder why she never raised the issue when I gave 250 k the previous two nights? I tell her she doesn't have to stay, she then decides she might have made a mistake.

However, there is a secondary prob. She has spent 260 K of her 200 k shopping budget in the first two days. So I tell her I am only giving her 40 K tomorrow, and she is not happy. Again I tell her she can leave if she wants to. Again she calms down. Then after a while, she starts telling me where she wants to go tomorrow, and what he wants to buy. I tell her three times, "We will go where I want, because this my holiday". By the time she tells me the fourth time, I've had enough. I've already paid her that day, I pay her for tomorrow and tell her goodbye. She then demands 20000 for taxi fare. We are actually in a bar about 60 metres from the hostel she is staying in!

I leave and move to another bar. A few minutes she shows up. I break one of the golden rules of mongering, "never drink from an open glass". This is about 9. 20 pm I remember telling her to leave me alone. I'd had 3 beers up to then. The next thing I remember was her and another woman pushing me out of a taxi at 4. 00 AM. My Credit and Debit cards, Digital Camera, Phone and spectacles are all missing. I think she doped my drink. If I were that drunk, I'd have had big hangover in the morning, but I felt no after effects.

Now I have huge problems. I am effectively incommunicado. I don't have a phone, and I can't see to use my laptop, I don't speak the language and I need help from someone nearby who does. I somehow am able to type a message on the laptop, giving my wife a brief "what happened" and asking her to contact my Airbnb host who speaks excellent English.

I explain to host what has happened, and that I need to get my phone back. She comes to the apartment. At my request, she sends a message to my phone offering 250 k reward, no questions asked. She also lets me phone my wife using whatspp, Wife arranges to cancel the cards, block the phone at the end of 24 hours waiting for a reply, Host also has a pair of "reader" glasses which she gives me so that I can get some use out of the laptop.

The wife says she will send €500 via Western Union. I go to WU to collect which is in an Internet Cafe. They ask me for code no, and passport. I give them both, They copy the passport. Click a few buttons on a computer, then tell me "no". It's not there. I assume the wife has forgotten to click the same day option, so I go back the next day. Still not arrived. I can't get an explanation or advice on what to do next because nobody speaks English. My host suggests I should try the local main office for WU, and at the third attempt I am successful. I later discover that though there are plenty of WU franchises in Cartagena, very few have resources to pay out much more than $250 US, but will never tell you this for fear of losing face.

I still have cash in the apartment, but I need the €500 to buy new specs. Not sure how much they will cost, but in DUB, my prescription, frames etc are about €350, and having bought new specs in Pattaya several years earlier, I found that there was little difference in price.

The show must go on. I am on the prowl and I see this extremely pretty girl who is with a fat ugly old hag. She was so ugly, she abuses the privilege, It turns out that there are aunt and niece and come from Barranquilla which is some distance from Cartagena. They will only work as a team. Pickings are slim. I do like the pretty one very much. Only the witch can speak English. I eventually agree to pay the pair 400 k, with the idea of sticking "ugly" in the spare bedroom. Across from the apartment, is an all-night supermarket. We get in a few beers and some snacks. The witch puts a bottle of 18 yr old Scotch in the basket. I remove it. They still manage to run up a bill of $60. We drink and smoke on the balcony, and to their credit, they are good fun. After a couple of hours, bed time, but the pretty one develops a bad attack of the starfish, Washout.

The next night I meet a stunning black girl, who looks like a very dark version of Diahann Carrol at her beautiful best. Back to apartment. Do the deed. Go to sleep. Wake up to find she is not there. Nothing missing. I've already paid her. No worries. I wake up later and she is sleeping alongside me. But this time when I look, the spare cash is gone. About 200 K. I wake her asking for an explanation, and it turns out, she has had a door to door delivery of cocaine. The cheek of the girl, to steal and remain at the scene of the crime. And maybe she has thought this through? If there is a confrontation and the police are called, the drugs are now in my apartment. Get rid of her with minimal fuss.

At this stage, there will be those who will ask, "Why don't you hide your money"? There are two reasons. The first is that I've never needed to in TH etc. The second is that the building has a steel gate which is deadlocked by a key. I don't want her to see where I am hiding my money because she might find the entire stash, so I hide the key instead. Unless she is prepared to drop down from the balcony, then she is going nowhere. So when I wake up and she's not in the apartment, I presume she has jumped off the 1st floor balcony.

The next night, while still waiting for my cash from WU, it is belting down a very wet and windy storm, and I am lurking at the Clock Tower, which is the main RLD. I bump into the hag and her niece again. I buy them a beer as a friendly gesture. There are very few customers about, and they tell me that they cannot get back to Barranquilla and have nowhere to sleep the night. Can they stay in the spare room? I tell them I am looking for company for the night. They offer themselves. A polite no thank you because "I never stay with same girl twice" is the excuse I give them. But if I find a girl that doesn't mind, they can stay in the spare room. They tell me they know a girl who might fit the bill, and show me a pic on their phone. They say she is aged 22. They give her a call. An agreement is struck. 300 K is agreed. We arrange to meet her back at my place. I tell the pair if they clean up the apartment and do my laundry, I will give 100 K in morning. Stop off at the supermarket again. Another trolley load, this time for $100. But there will be four of us eating and drinking.

While we are waiting for the other girl to arrive, the hag approaches me and says I should pay her the money as the girl had a habit of promising to stay all night, and then leaving after an hour. That's a legally grey area, because the chances are that if you stop her from leaving, you will probably be committing some type of crime. I smell scam. I suspect that they will only give the girl part of the money. I intend to tell her how much I paid. The girl arrives by cab. We spend some more balcony time, before I take the girl to the room. This girl, Elena, is positively the real deal. I make her the offer 250 k a day plus shopping trips for the remainder of my stay using the hag's google translate. She accepts.

I wake up in the morning smile on my face. The apartment is tidy and my laundry is hanging out to dry. A couple of hours later, the pair are awake. I give the hag100 k and then she goes into one, insisting that I had agreed to pay them for their "company" and they only did the cleaning as a favour. I think best to give them another 50 K I produce the cash. She takes it and she still wants more. Eventually, I tell her "Another 50 K. Take it and go. If she does not accept, I will keep the money. She refuses, but so far she has taken 150 k.

I want to call the police, but I can't because I have no phone. Looking out from the balcony, I see a couple passing by. All of us are trying to attract the cops. They stand under the balcony, while the pair shout something to them in Spanish. They get on the radio, and over the next 20 minutes another 6 cops show up. This is beginning to look like Waco. Eventually one cop seeks access. The hag and the niece spend about 10 minutes telling the cop their version. The cop does not speak English so we are left to the tender mercies of Google translate. At one stage I say, "She is talking Garbage" and it comes back as "She is talking gay boy". Cringeeeeeeee! The cop having heard their version and without waiting for my input, tells me I have to pay them 400 k, because they have told him I agreed to pay them for 400 k for "company".

I now try to tell him via Google translate, my version including that I have already given them 150 k. They deny this. I tell him they should be searched. He asks them to open their bags, where he finds the 300 k due to Elena. When she hears what this money is for, she is clearly surprised, She realises that she has been scammed by them too, but says nothing. The reason for her silence becomes clear a bit later.

I tell the cop, that they have hidden the money somewhere about their person, and that they should be searched by a female officer. It appears that he is totally unaware that women might possibly have orifices where small items such as banknotes might be hidden. The niece then pulls down the top of her dress and lifts her bra up to show her exposed breasts. The cop is very happily satisfied with this display of "honesty".

The cop refuses to call for a female cop, and is still insisting that I must pay 400 k. I refuse, and then try to appeal to his reason. Big mistake. I ask him how much he would pay a woman to clean his apartment and do his laundry for a couple of hours work? Police basic salaries in Colombia are $330 per month. He tells me 250 k (about $68 US). I ask him does he live in Buckingham Palace, but the sarcasm is lost on him.

I try a new tack. They have Tourist Police in TH, and they have a reputation for protecting tourists from predatory behaviour including that of other cops. In addition, they usually work in pairs when one speaks English and the other, German, Maybe if we can get someone who speaks English involved I will get some justice. I tell the cop, "Call the Tourist Police, and I will accept whatever decision they make". He refuses, and tells me that if I won't pay them 400 k, we will all have to go down "the nick" and we will be in there a long time. I hold my wrists out suggesting he should put the handcuffs. He pulls out the cuffs, shows them to me, and then puts them back in their pouch. I've called his bluff. This has been going on for an hour by now. Eventually, he does call the TP. When two arrive my first question I ask is, "Do you speak English". Both say "So so". Better than nothing I think.

Turns out they can only really communicate via Google translate. Oh dear! So all parties give a total rehash of the events. The TP tell me that if we go to the police station, it is "Two against one, and you will not be believed". I point out that as only the hag can can speak English, whatever the other says, can at best, only be what the hag has told her, and is thus hearsay. Again, I offer my wrists for cuffing.

The three cops have a conflab, and take a new approach and ask for passports and ID cards. All are produced including Elena's. Eventually, the TP cops come back to me and tell me. "Give them another 100 K". I am not happy, but I naively said I would be bound by their decision, so I pay up.

The hag and the niece are dismissed, but Elena remains. As they are leaving, I see them with a carrier bag full of the unused groceries from the night before that I had paid for. I try to take these back telling the cops that I paid for these. The cops ask me for the receipt, which I left in the shop. I ask the cops where is "their receipt" but the cops wave them on. FFS! All this because I thought I was helping the pair with somewhere to stay on a stormy night.

Now the cops tell me that Elena is either an asylum seeker, or an illegal immigrant from Venezuela. I can't quite work out which. According to them, I have committed a serious crime in having such a girl in my apartment. They want $500 to "fix the problem". I tell them that as Elena does not speak English, and I don't Spanish, how could I even know she was from VZ? Another police conflab, and they now tell me that she will be arrested for deportation as an illegal. Suddenly she becomes a pawn in this new game. They again offer to "fix the problem". I don't want to see her become too.

I have about 600 k in cash in my pockets. The rest is stashed. $500 is about 1. 7 mill Colombian. I tell them about my recent drugging / robbery and tell them I only have 600 K. I eventually beat them down to 300 K which they divide among the three of them and they leave.

Elena and I start communicating on Google Translate on the laptop using type. No chance of unintentional slurs. It turns out that Elena is not an illegal, but has an ID card as a refugee, but is not allowed to work. She is also aged 19. She thanks me for rescuing her from deportation. She tells me that she has been in Colombia since she was 15 and the hag and niece have been pimping her out all that time. They tell her that they have a customer for her for say 150 k, but don't disclose they are getting twice that amount and keeping half for themselves. They tell her that by them getting payment, there is no chance that the customer can rob her, and she has accepted this line. They also tell her that they have known all her customers a long time, so she will be safe.

We are using the laptop in the bedroom because it is the most convenient place. After a while I start to sense a change of vibe. I have, as is my habit, put my cash on the bedside table. This is the 300 K that the police did not take. She suggests that I take a shower, and then she will take one. I ask why not together? I think I know where this is going. Eventually, she agrees that she will have the first shower, during which time, I stash the cash, just leaving 50 K in view. We have our showers, and when I come out, the 50 K is gone. She tells me she must go to the supermarket to buy phone credit. I open the security gate for her. I go back up to the apartment and see her trying to stop a taxi. She succeeds after a couple of minutes, and I decide that I got off lightly.

Remember, this is the girl who I have just saved from deportation at a cost of 300 k and who I also put wise to the fact that she was being scammed for 150 k which she able to recover. She is on a promise of 250 k a day for the duration, which even if she goes back to being scammed, is still 100 k more than she was getting. Then there are the shopping trips.

A couple of thoughts occur to me. The first is the Goldwyism, "A verbal contract is not worth the paper it's written on". However, more salient is the story of the "Scorpion and the Frog". Four meetings, and four times the Scorpions have struck. And like the Scorpion in the tale, they just can't help themselves. They will sting even when it's against their best interests to do so. That whole incident has cost me over 1. 1 mill Colombian, or about $300 USD /€250.

Now I've had enough. I decide that this is now the time to get the hell out of here. Tomorrow, when I get my cash from WU, I will be booking a flight home. I get my cash from WU at the third attempt by going to their main branch in Cartagena, thanks to the assistance of Alberto, a friend of my Airbnb host.

I try to contact to KLM to use the unexpired part of my ticket as part-payment, but all can find is a "FAQ" link which does not cover my problem. I don't have plastic so can't buy the ticket online, and I can't ask my wife to do so, because it has to be co-ordinated with both a new PCR test and a MIGform linked to the specific flight I am leaving on. Migform is basically a permission to enter an leave the country.

Travelling from S. America, I don't have the same rights if I fail to make the flight for a refund that I would have if I missed the flight as I would have if it were in the EU. I recall that my Airbnb's host's sister is a Travel agent. She agrees to take care of everything for me. This is by now Tuesday, and she can get me on a KLM flight for Thursday. The price is 5. 1 million Colombian, nearly €1200. Still there is the prob that I don't have cards, and her office is closed due to CV. The only way I can make payment is into a bank account, and she has given me the details.

I contact the wife and ask her to send another €800 so I have enough cash to pay, as well as make sure I have some reserves in case something else goes wrong. By now I have bought a cheap phone, and arranged to let her phone ring twice, and she will call me back so I don't have to keep buying credit for the phone. She phones me back. I tell her what I need. She sends the money online via WU and phones me to let me know. Alberto is again drafted in to assist. We go to WU, and are told the money was sent, but then cancelled by WU. It turns out that for obvious reasons, Colombia is a high risk country as far as WU is concerned and anyone sending two quick successive payments there is subject to vetting.

They ask her to scan her ID document so they can verify her ID. There is a problem here. My wife is Japanese, and when we married, she failed to notify the Japanese Embassy. Her parents did so notifying their local town hall. When my wife went to renew her passport, they had hyphenated our surnames. However, when she opened a bank account in Ireland, she just used her married name. The names did not match exactly, so WU initially withheld the payment, and then later cancelled it completely. Alberto acting as interpreter tells me that the payment was cancelled by WU. Just about the same time, my wife phones me to tell me the same.

This is about 4 pm local time, but 10 pm in DUB. The only other thing I can think of, is that instead the money online through WU, she should go to the WU which is run by the Post Office in Ireland, the following morning. First, she needs to go the bank to draw cash.

She phones me the following morning to say it's done. The difference in fees between paying online is €37.50. It's €2. 50 to do it online, but €40 to pay cash at the PO. Alberto is again drafted in. We collect the cash from WU, go to the bank and pay it into the Travel agency account. The agent has booked an appointment for the PCR test and completed the Migform for me. Alberto takes me to the test centre. Ticket and Migform are sent to my laptop. I take Alberto for a good lunch, a few beers and give him 150 k for his troubles. He is delighted. I've made up the balance for the ticket from the reserves in my stash.

Now alI need to do is wait for the PCR results, and I am pretty confident that in just over 30 hours time I will be on a plane. What could possibly go wrong? Not much as it happens, but it tries. I decide I am going to have one last drink in Getsemane. It really is a beautiful district and resembles pics I have seen of Havana, another place on my bucket list. However, I am adamant that there will be no more women for me knowing what I've suffered so far.

So I am about to leave the bar at closing time, and as I leave, there is Angela from my first couple of nights. She sees me. Lets out a whoop and a big smile, and I immediately turn back into the bar to get away from her. She follows me. During my stay in the bar, I have bought the barman a couple of beers. He immediately understands the situation and comes from behind the bar to cut her off and tells her to go. He locks the door. I wait 10 minutes and when I leave she is gone. Taxi home and tomorrow I leave.

Have a shower, and go to sleep. About 3. 30, I am woken by a couple of loud bangs. I work out it is someone thowing stones at the apartment to get my attention. I go to the balcony, and there in all her beauty is the coke-snorting "Diahann Carroll". I really cannot believe that both these Scorpions think I will again carry them across the stormy river. I tell her "Vamos". She says something imploringly in Spanish, but I go back inside and watch her through a chink in the curtain. After a couple of minutes, she decides to leave and she is joined by a man who seems to have been hiding in the shadows. Hmmm? Do you think she wanted a threesome?

I go back to bed, and when I awake my PCR test is ready. Negative. I am good to go. I have ordered a taxi for 3. 00 pm. At the airport, I need to get rid of my Pesos. I go to to the only money changing kiosk in the airport, and see the rates. I have been getting 3500 to the USD, and 4200 to the Euro. They are offering 2700/3500. I ask for Euros, but the teller tells me he only had USD. I don't believe him, but I am unlikely to be able to change Pesos in Ireland so I accept his paltry offer.

Just when I think I've witnessed the last act of petty larceny that I am likely to suffer, there is still one more event. I am going through the X-ray search, and I have about 10 k in small coins. That's about $2. 75. What I normally do is deposit these in the charity box at the departing airport where they are normally collecting for kids. I empty the change into the X-ray box. I ask the cop who is watching me, if there is a charity box. He tells me yes, and offers to take care of it for me. I give him the coins. As well as the cop, there are four female search team workers. He then goes round to each of them saying "Caridad. Caridad" (Spanish for "charity") and they all have a fit of the giggles as he distributes the money among the five of them. Temperate language defies what I really want to say about this.

So time for a bit of introspection. How could it all have gone so disastrously wrong at nearly every twist and turn? I have to take some of the blame because it appears that most Colombians are venal and dishonest, and apparently your chances of becoming a victim increase, the less Spanish you know. All I really know are the courtesies, so I was unknowingly walking around with a target on my back.

I also was naive enough to rely on my experiences from SEA, and Thailand in particular. I always try to avoid cynicism in my dealings with the locals, especially in TH. I've found that most people will respond positively if you treat them with fairness and respect. As an example, when I've dealt with a girl in TH, the most common price I've been quoted is "Up to you". I realise that this is coming from a position of weakness on their part, but I don't want the girl to spend the night wondering if I am going to abuse that weakness. So my habit is not to mention a price, but instead take them direct to my "loom" and pay them in advance, asking them, "Is this OK"? Never had a refusal yet or demand for more money with that practice.

As soon as she says "yes", we leave the room, where I feed her, take her bar-hopping and if I see a street vendor selling a nice dress, or if she has kids, I buy her a gift (s) like a teddy bear, and not the cheapest either. Then it's back to the room at the end of the night for her to fulfill her part of the bargain. If she passes the "job interview", I ask her to stay. Then it's repeat and rinse for the duration. In Pattaya, any relationship that lasts more than three days, can be considered "long term". I've had multiple cases of 10+ days with a single girl. I've even had the girl from the last trip coming to meet and greet me at BKK airport when I've returned several months later.

The only examples of bad behaviour I've encountered in TH, was one girl I paid in advance who when I took her to get something to eat, did a runner. If it's going to happen, better it happens before I really start to trust her. One other girl, who I bumped into about six months after a previous visit: By now she was about six months pregnant and claimed I was the father. I explained about DNA and amniocentesis. I also explained that I contracted Mumps as a child, and there was a 50/50 chance of sterility, and that I was on the wrong side of that metric. "Do you really want to undergo an amnio"? She backed off.

As with Colombia, my habit is always to empty the remains of the day's cash from my pockets and it is in full view of my guest. I've never lost a satong yet. That speaks very well for the Thai ladies. The only conclusion I can come to is that the TH ladies lack the minds of Scorpions, and I cannot emphasise how grateful I am for the happiness that these attitudes have given me.

So if the question is, "Do I wait until TH has reopened, or go to Colombia where you don't even need a PCR test or to quarantine"? My answer is avoid Colombia like the plague. But if you are going to ignore my advice, then at least learn sufficient Spanish to reduce the size of the target on your back, that all Gringos carry. And if you have a cynical attitude towards the "ladies" in TH, and I know quite a few do, then I think you should really try Colombia to get a sense of perspective.

[QUOTE=JustTK;2595977]You know that negv tests are not required for Colombia?[/QUOTE]Yes I was aware, but I needed it to be able to board my flight from DUB to AMS with both Ireland and Holland requiring negative tests.

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[QUOTE=Dublin12;2602033]So I finally arrive in Colombia and on my first night, I meet one of the very few natives, Angela who can speak English. I have a plan which usually works very well in TH. Try to find one girl to "wife up for the duration" I am offering 1800 USD ($65 per night = 250000 Colombian pesos) plus daily shopping trips for about another (100 k per day) $850 in total as well as random acts of generosity. Angela is interested. Then she starts to claim that I had promised her $250 USD per night. If I did, then you might wonder why she never raised the issue when I gave 250 k the previous two nights?...
I tell her three times, "We will go where I want, because this my holiday". By the time she tells me the fourth time, I've had enough. I've already paid her that day, I pay her for tomorrow and tell her goodbye.[/QUOTE]Hmm. Seems like I VAGUELY remember telling you that was not a good idea. Also seems I said something about discarding advice to your own detriment because you do not like how it was said.

Spoon feed them hoes. Don't push their chair up to a buffet counter.

[QUOTE=Dublin12;2602033]My answer is avoid Colombia like the plague. But if you are going to ignore my advice, [/QUOTE]LOL. But since you ignored my advice...! Why even ask advice if you are just looking for confirmation of the idea you already have in your head. Of course folks always have to learn the hard way. Can ask and have answered 1 million questions all for naught, because after millions of years of human existence, experience remains the best teacher. Great report!

[QUOTE=Dublin12;2602033]The Holiday in Hell[/QUOTE]Great report!

[QUOTE=Dublin12;2602033]So if the question is, "Do I wait until TH has reopened, or go to Colombia where you don't even need a PCR test or to quarantine"? My answer is avoid Colombia like the plague. But if you are going to ignore my advice, then at least learn sufficient Spanish to reduce the size of the target on your back, that all Gringos carry. And if you have a cynical attitude towards the "ladies" in TH, and I know quite a few do, then I think you should really try Colombia to get a sense of perspective.[/QUOTE]First off accolades for such a great trip report. But the accolade is for sharing what you experienced, a lot of guys would of been to embarrassed to share what you went thru, and there will be posters who will chastise you.

Colombia for many is a wet dream beyond belief. Kind of like hitting a grand slam home run at times. You struck out multiple times, and your correct about speaking Spanish, without it your hosed in my book, but some may disagree with me, but you get it.

And as far as waiting for Thailand to re-open, I'm not holding my breath that it wii even really open up next year, so maybe you should start studying Spanish and return to Colombia.

But don't go to Cartagena, it's probably the most expensive place to monger in Colombia.

[QUOTE=Dublin12;2602033]Further to my most recent post, I promised a trip report. I thought you might be interested in hearing of my misadventures. This rapidly became the holiday in hell.

I won't bore you with all the problems I had trying to book this, but between my bank, the credit card co, and Colombian bureaucracy, I should have taken the hint, that this was never going to end well.[/QUOTE]Was it Forest Gump who said it best "Stupid is as stupid does".

I think you would do great living here in Colombia as you love the drama and you can find plenty of it here in Colombia to write many more posts on your exploits, hehehehe.

It's reports and reviews like these as to why Cartagena has turned into a dump-land to find decent chicas.

Much love and respect to all!

The Tall Man (still shaking my head no, no, no).