Seeking Arrangements

[Steve 9696]

Respectfully disagree with some of the other posters.

If you're getting into a relationship with a sugars, fine don't lie. They'll be around you enough and there are signs. Phone calls, name tags, hotel check in sheets, etc.

But for the short term thing you're describing, absolutely say you're single. I always do. Because the last thing you want is a girl who has personal info on you and can blackmail you. I lie about basically everything that can identify me.

I think the point was specifically about marriage status, which is something that "matters" to girls. Def obfuscate everything else. False name. Burner phone. Occupation and whatever. These are just white lies. If you want something that might develop past the first date then the marriage thing is a tough on to reneg on IMO.

Although also as MW said it's tough to obscure your identity forever with a girl you spend lots of time with. Hardest is hotel TV screen. It's going to have your real name and if you leave her alone in the room she could see it. Just an FYI for everyone — that's tough to conceal.

[AmericanPi]

Respectfully disagree with some of the other posters.

If you're getting into a relationship with a sugars, fine don't lie. They'll be around you enough and there are signs. Phone calls, name tags, hotel check in sheets, etc.

But for the short term thing you're describing, absolutely say you're single. I always do. Because the last thing you want is a girl who has personal info on you and can blackmail you. I lie about basically everything that can identify me.

Hey guys,

I am going to in Europe (posted about it a few times) on a SA focused mongering trip. I am married, but wife won't know about this hobby.

Do you guys tell your SA potential about your relationship status in real life? I am chatting with a cute girl from SA and we have a really good chemistry. I may want to spend a lot of time with her when in Europe and may be even go on trips with her. But I haven't told her yet that I am married. My SA profile also says that I am "Single". I didn't think too much back then, mostly just assuming that SA girls wouldn't want to talk to me if I told them I am married.

So question for you folks: what would you do in this situation? Should I tell her the truth? There is a good chance that she will not be as warm towards me if she finds out that I am married. If she decides to bail, it will be a loss. But I guess I can find other girls who will be more PPM oriented. There are no dearth of girls willing to talk and meet, but she was a bit special w. Are. T. Our chemistry so far.

[DramaFree11]

Thanks for the advice! I already lied to her in chat. She suddenly asked if I'm single and / or have kids, and I panicked and said no. I guess I'll have to figure out a way to find clean. Maybe say I lied on chat because it was hard to explain over chat, and wanted to talk on person / over call: thatthings are a bit complicated.

That is the great benefit about SA, no reason to lie in an arrangement.

[Intelligencium]

Thanks for the advice! I already lied to her in chat. She suddenly asked if I'm single and / or have kids, and I panicked and said no. I guess I'll have to figure out a way to find clean. Maybe say I lied on chat because it was hard to explain over chat, and wanted to talk on person / over call: thatthings are a bit complicated

Do not lie about being single. I do not know how many times I have lied to an SB about being single, but there were two occasions where it ended horribly, to the extent that I was even scared. Both of these times, the SBs said that if I had told the truth about being married, then the relationship would have been great, but that I blew it by lying. For whatever reason, pretty much all gals hate being lied to by men, probably because we lie all the time to bed women.

And no, you cannot lie about being single forever. They will find out the truth. It is just a matter of time.

I just started a new relationship with a new SB. Long story short, I met her three years ago and got her contact. After some back and forth texting, I asked her to be my GF. She asked me what that implied. I said it would be a PPM arrangement. She told me to fuck off. I kept pursuing it, she kept balking and even deleted my contact a couple of times, but recently she finally agreed, after I reassured her that I was not a monster. The first session went well. A few days later, she asked me if I was married. I decided to try a new response. I told her it was a secret. She scoffed, but then said that it did not matter. Maybe you can try this. She probably thinks there is a 99% chance that I am married, but maybe that 1% makes a difference in her mind.

.

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[Midwestern]

Do not lie about being single. I do not know how many times I have lied to an SB about being single, but there were two occasions where it ended horribly, to the extent that I was even scared. Both of these times, the SBs said that if I had told the truth about being married, then the relationship would have been great, but that I blew it by lying. For whatever reason, pretty much all gals hate being lied to by men, probably because we lie all the time to bed women.

And no, you cannot lie about being single forever. They will find out the truth. It is just a matter of time.

I just started a new relationship with a new SB. Long story short, I met her three years ago and got her contact. After some back and forth texting, I asked her to be my GF. She asked me what that implied. I said it would be a PPM arrangement. She told me to fuck off. I kept pursuing it, she kept balking and even deleted my contact a couple of times, but recently she finally agreed, after I reassured her that I was not a monster. The first session went well. A few days later, she asked me if I was married. I decided to try a new response. I told her it was a secret. She scoffed, but then said that it did not matter. Maybe you can try this. She probably thinks there is a 99% chance that I am married, but maybe that 1% makes a difference in her mind.

Hey guys,

I am going to in Europe (posted about it a few times) on a SA focused mongering trip. I am married, but wife won't know about this hobby.

Do you guys tell your SA potential about your relationship status in real life? I am chatting with a cute girl from SA and we have a really good chemistry. I may want to spend a lot of time with her when in Europe and may be even go on trips with her. But I haven't told her yet that I am married. My SA profile also says that I am "Single". I didn't think too much back then, mostly just assuming that SA girls wouldn't want to talk to me if I told them I am married.

So question for you folks: what would you do in this situation? Should I tell her the truth? There is a good chance that she will not be as warm towards me if she finds out that I am married. If she decides to bail, it will be a loss. But I guess I can find other girls who will be more PPM oriented. There are no dearth of girls willing to talk and meet, but she was a bit special w. Are. T. Our chemistry so far.

But if I don't tell her and then go on trips with her (or spend significant time with her), I will have to figure out how to be really discrete about my real life. E. g. If wifey calls, I will have to make up some story about who is calling me.

Anyone gone through an experience like this? What did you do? What would you do in my situation?

.

[Steve 9696]

If any of you guys have had long-run success with a local SB (I. E. , an SB that lives in the same city as you), then I'd like to hear about it. What made it work out or is making it work out?

One of my SBs is getting annoyed at the PPM arrangment and occassionally wants to hang out with me (such as occassional lunches, going to the movies, and going out at night, all without sex) like a real GF. In the past, this might have been okay, but I am now not into this for the following reasons: (1) I am simply too busy with my professional and personal life. (2) I do not want to be seen with a GF or SB for professional and personal reasons.

I did have many local SBs that were just PPM and they did not need any other maintenance, but for them, this eventually got old and they did not like the feeling that they were pros. There must be a right balance between a real GF and PPM SB, but I am not finding it.

I would like to hear from people with actual experience only.

TIA.

So I have a certain amount of experience with this. First with a girl that was very OK but I could take or leave her. She was very new to the game. After our first three dates we were having dinner and she said "we aren't going to have sex every date are we". And I said yep we are. I simply said that it's really important to me and a part of a complete relationship. I think she was shocked. But we never failed to have sex.

Second of course is with Shayla. She totally understands the game tho. Before I got her the apartment we were def sex every time. But then once we got the apt I might see her a couple times a week and only have sex one of those times. But sometimes she might deflect sex or we were just partying with her friends. And frankly it's not worth lying to my wife for that. I kinda said that to her once and that didn't go so well. Maybe too honest. But I did come pretty straight on when she deflected sex and the few times it happened she clarified that I just need to let her know and it's ok to fuck with her friends in the living room!

I'm sure your sitch is a bit different, but I tend to go with the confront it route. Tell her sex is a super important part of your relationship and it makes you sad when you skip. And see what she says. Does she want to make you sad?

[Steve 9696]

Hey guys,

I am going to in Europe (posted about it a few times) on a SA focused mongering trip. I am married, but wife won't know about this hobby.

Do you guys tell your SA potential about your relationship status in real life? I am chatting with a cute girl from SA and we have a really good chemistry. I may want to spend a lot of time with her when in Europe and may be even go on trips with her. But I haven't told her yet that I am married. My SA profile also says that I am "Single". I didn't think too much back then, mostly just assuming that SA girls wouldn't want to talk to me if I told them I am married.

So question for you folks: what would you do in this situation? Should I tell her the truth? There is a good chance that she will not be as warm towards me if she finds out that I am married. If she decides to bail, it will be a loss. But I guess I can find other girls who will be more PPM oriented. There are no dearth of girls willing to talk and meet, but she was a bit special w. Are. T. Our chemistry so far.

But if I don't tell her and then go on trips with her (or spend significant time with her), I will have to figure out how to be really discrete about my real life. E. g. If wifey calls, I will have to make up some story about who is calling me.

Anyone gone through an experience like this? What did you do? What would you do in my situation?

My status on Seeking is Open Relationship even tho I am married like you. Perhaps that's a better status than single but up to you. It is rare for the girls to care (a girl who is on SA prob has more advanced views on monogamy than your average girl) and I think even more rare with nonUS girls since they don't have puritanical bullshit in their head. Regardless worldwide it's only been an issue twice with a newbies in the US. Otherwise I make no pretense. I wear my wedding ring when we fuck. More than 50 girls with that wedding ring in plain view 24/7. So doubt you have a problem. Don't wear your ring if you are super nervous but I think it's also better to just be transparent. I'm 99% she won't care.

[Intelligencium]

Hey guys,

I am going to in Europe (posted about it a few times) on a SA focused mongering trip. I am married, but wife won't know about this hobby.

Do you guys tell your SA potential about your relationship status in real life? I am chatting with a cute girl from SA and we have a really good chemistry. I may want to spend a lot of time with her when in Europe and may be even go on trips with her. But I haven't told her yet that I am married. My SA profile also says that I am "Single". I didn't think too much back then, mostly just assuming that SA girls wouldn't want to talk to me if I told them I am married.

So question for you folks: what would you do in this situation? Should I tell her the truth? There is a good chance that she will not be as warm towards me if she finds out that I am married. If she decides to bail, it will be a loss. But I guess I can find other girls who will be more PPM oriented. There are no dearth of girls willing to talk and meet, but she was a bit special w. Are. T. Our chemistry so far.

But if I don't tell her and then go on trips with her (or spend significant time with her), I will have to figure out how to be really discrete about my real life. E. g. If wifey calls, I will have to make up some story about who is calling me.

Anyone gone through an experience like this? What did you do? What would you do in my situation?

[Midwestern]

If any of you guys have had long-run success with a local SB (I. E. , an SB that lives in the same city as you), then I'd like to hear about it. What made it work out or is making it work out?

One of my SBs is getting annoyed at the PPM arrangment and occassionally wants to hang out with me (such as occassional lunches, going to the movies, and going out at night, all without sex) like a real GF. In the past, this might have been okay, but I am now not into this for the following reasons: (1) I am simply too busy with my professional and personal life. (2) I do not want to be seen with a GF or SB for professional and personal reasons.

I did have many local SBs that were just PPM and they did not need any other maintenance, but for them, this eventually got old and they did not like the feeling that they were pros. There must be a right balance between a real GF and PPM SB, but I am not finding it.

I would like to hear from people with actual experience only.

TIA.

[Steve 9696]

Anyone have experience in London? Also, how much.

I've done SA four times in London and all were great. Bear in mind I'm very good at the weed and feed process and finding the gems. You can get a non pro hottie for 300-400 but it takes work just like SA always does.

[LshRoomer]

Are you limited to Germany? SA in Spain would be more promising if you like Latinas. Just search Madrid and you will be blown away on selection. And if you go and SA doesn't pan out there is always Vive to see the hotties face to face and fuck on-site.

Spain. Damn. Didn't mention it because you sounded like you were going to be Germany. I stayed away from Spain for years and finally when I decided to go, I was hit with a tidal wave of smoking hot Spanish girls (latina and european), eastern euros; an entire buffet (I even had a french morrocan SB in Madrid). My current SB / GF is in Spain as well as 2 of my favorite GFE escorts. I'll be there twice this summer! You can't go wrong. I've even stopped girls on the street and talked to them. It's awesome.

One thing that could be considered a con depending on your comfort and skill level is language. It is very helpful to know some spanish. Not as much the case in Deutschland, you can get by rather well with english. My SB doesn't really speak english, but we get by really well with a romanian, spanish, english combination. But then again, the french SB that I met spoke english perfect with a french accent, so I guess it depends on who you come across.

Good luck and report back.

02.

[Clone8884]

Anyone have experience in London? Also, how much.

[Intelligencium]

Are you limited to Germany? SA in Spain would be more promising if you like Latinas. Just search Madrid and you will be blown away on selection. And if you go and SA doesn't pan out there is always Vive to see the hotties face to face and fuck on-site.

It's like you can read my mind Steve.

The cities I mentioned with high SA potential are BCN and Madrid! Which is why FKKs are a bit out of the way.

So here's my new plan:

1. Frankfurt day 1 to visit FKK Sharks.

2. Spain for next 10 days, likely equally split between BCN and Madrid. Sight-seeing, SA dating and some regular old-fashioned mongering.

3. Frankfurt last day to either revisit FKK Sharks or try Oase.

[Steve 9696]

I'm going to be in Taiwan in next couple of weeks for some business- never used SA in that side of world before and when browsing thru SA profiles, don't see as much Volume as I experienced in South American or European continent, plus language is a definite barrier (I spoke several languages but none of them are Asian).

Given there's not much data to look thru for TW, any input or insight on how much is base or reference PPM for few hours of date in Taiwan?

Comments or thoughts appreciated.

Taiwan is one of the toughest venues in the world imo. Because prostitution is very illegal and foreigners are generally kept out of the game there. I've never done SA there but bet it's dicey. You will need a Line broker to hook you up. (Line is like Whatapp). You can hookup thru them. Go to Taipei thread to learn more. There is a guy on there named Windrunner or something that was able to point me right direction.

[Steve 9696]

Super helpful response. Thanks!

Unfortunately, the cities with good SA potential are not the cities with FKKs. So if I lean more towards SA, I will skip Cologne, Zurich and even Amsterdam. But if I plan for more FKK visits + Amsterdam experience, that will eat up 4-5 days in the trip and I might miss meeting some good SA potentials. Hence the dilemma.

Luckily since I am landing / leaving from Frankfurt, I will at least be able to have an FKK experience the first day I land and then may be change my plans if needed. At this point, based on both of your responses, I am leaning towards spending more time in cities with higher SA potential and doing 1-2 FKKs in Frankfurt. Also, the cities where I have higher SA potential also have other mongering opportunities with hot WGs.

Are you limited to Germany? SA in Spain would be more promising — if you like Latinas. Just search Madrid and you will be blown away on selection. And if you go and SA doesn't pan out there is always Vive to see the hotties face to face and fuck on-site.