Seeking Arrangements

[Akibono]

Generally, I also want to avoid sex in the first meet. As I said, I am afraid of entrapment (perhaps an irrational fear, but we can't be rational all the time), also a first meet and greet does give a chance to get to know, understand, reflect and if still liking the girl, get back with her. Also, as someone else mentioned, the ones who agree to have sex before even the first meet and greet are more likely professional girls and that is usually not my ideal spec. The genuine student, waitress or bartender, office receptionist or even young single mom types may want to also get to know you before agreeing to fuck. I did have sex on some first dates. But in those situations, we still met for a lunch or dinner, spent some time talking, and we both decided we liked each other enough and went to a room nearby. The agreement happened during the meet, not before the meet..

Finally going on my first date. I find the process quite awkward since I am new to this. My main concern is not being stuck with a skanky ho or being robbed. In the states, you have to worry more about scams. We agreed to meet at a place for a bite or drink and then go up to the hotel. How is payment typically handled? I presume you pay at the beginning, but I am a bit concerned that the gal will grab the money and run and I will have to face her pimp. But I also understand that the girl does not want to be stiffed too. I never have problems with escorts because they know the drill. I am going to put the money out and she can take it when she leaves. I think that is a good compromise. What do you think are some risks I am not aware of? I am single so I am not worried about them knowing my name, but I am a bit concerned about my car since plates can easily be traced. Don't want strangers showing up at my place. Not cool.

[Midwestern]

Maybe take it a tad further. State it as a command. "Meet me at xxxx at xx:00 PM. " I learned this from a friend who was taking psychology courses. He said most of us are indecisive, mostly because we worry too much about making bad decisions, so it relaxes a person to take that nervousness away from them. My success rate is way, way better when I say "let's go to my room" as opposed to "want to go to my room?"

So I've been reading a lot of Nanpa (Japanese street pickup) of late and it has a lot of very helpful tips for closing the deal with girls in general and therefore SA girls. Without it there is no way I would have closed Jesse in Las Vegas (full story available if anyone is interested) but more recently it's been helping me increase my contact rate on SA!

The idea is after you "open" a girl on the street and I want to get her to drinks or such you don't say "do you want to xxx". You say "I'm going to go do xxx. Want to come". It's a subtle difference but it's a difference.

So on SA I used to try to think up clever things to say and how to catch their attention. The past two days I've just been saying "I'm going to XX to do YYY on Saturday. Want to join me?" And the number of responses has spiked dramatically. Still some ways to go to see which deal I close if any but it is interesting how quick I get interest this way.

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[Steve 9696]

So I've been reading a lot of Nanpa (Japanese street pickup) of late and it has a lot of very helpful tips for closing the deal with girls in general and therefore SA girls. Without it there is no way I would have closed Jesse in Las Vegas (full story available if anyone is interested) but more recently it's been helping me increase my contact rate on SA!

The idea is after you "open" a girl on the street and I want to get her to drinks or such you don't say "do you want to xxx". You say "I'm going to go do xxx. Want to come". It's a subtle difference but it's a difference.

So on SA I used to try to think up clever things to say and how to catch their attention. The past two days I've just been saying "I'm going to XX to do YYY on Saturday. Want to join me?" And the number of responses has spiked dramatically. Still some ways to go to see which deal I close if any but it is interesting how quick I get interest this way.

[Midwestern]

I prefer SA gals that live an hour or two away from me. This means that a meet and greet can take up to an entire half day. So I often hope for instant chemistry, so that we can just waltz to the hotel room, so sometimes I roll the dice and book a room for the first date. But like Pessimist says, many times the gal doesn't show up, and I'm stuck with a room. One might think it's easy to just quickly book a room (on an app) after the gal shows up and chemistry is established, but you still have you still check in, which means she'll find out your real identity.

[Pessimist]

With respect to reports below. I try to get through the price per meet before meeting. I say I don't do allowances because my schedule is not predictable. I tell them I'd like to meet at the bar of the hotel and get to know each other first. And, if agreeable come up to my room to get more familiar. Obviously, this is an upscale hotel and that makes them more comfortable. The idea that we would go up to my room speaks for itself on planned activities. And, we meet first before commitment which makes them feel more comfortable.

Meeting for lunch or coffee never fucking ever goes anywhere. Girls know if they're going to fuck you the second they see you. Give them time and they chicken out or some freaking thing happens.

In my city, there are so many fakes and flakes on SA. If you hit up white girls in the 18-25 range with attractive photos and slim bodies, only a small percent even respond back. Of the girls that respond back, some want only an online relationship. Some say that they will meet but will only entertain a platonic arrangement but expect $500 to $1000 a month for purely platonic arrangements. Some girls are willing to do NSA and more but demand a cash app payment sent to them before any first meet. Some agree to meet but want to get paid cash at the meet. Yesterday one girl demanded $50 for a coffee meet and $100 for a lunch meet. She gave a reasonable $250 to $300 for FwB ppm but will not budge on the $50 to $100 initial meet and greet payment.

This is the reality where I live. If you have better luck in your area, good for you. But I have been doing this for 4 years and had several dozen SBs over time, and the above situation has been consistent over time.

The issue is all about the first meet. Once I met a girl, we know each other, it is never a problem from second meet on. We know what we each want and have some amount of trust. But first meet is always tricky.

If I am on the road and already have a hotel, I can ask the girl to meet at my hotel. But in my home city, I am not going to rent a hotel room without knowing the girl will show up for sure. Given how many flakes there are on the site, it would be foolish to rent a room, and hope that the girl will show up. I know guys who have done it and looked like fools being stuck with a room but no girl.

I think if you get a good SB, you should hold onto her. Sure, I like to sample as many girls as possible, but I go to FKKs for this. If I get a really good girl, I try to do at least a few months with her, assuming one or two meets a month. This implies say, ten fucks in a few months? I have fucked some FKK girls many more times than that, such as Megan in Sharks, Lavinia in Oase and so on. I am able to tolerate ten fuck sessions with a good girl spanning a few months.

[FunForMikey]

With respect to reports below. I try to get through the price per meet before meeting. I say I don't do allowances because my schedule is not predictable. I tell them I'd like to meet at the bar of the hotel and get to know each other first. And, if agreeable come up to my room to get more familiar. Obviously, this is an upscale hotel and that makes them more comfortable. The idea that we would go up to my room speaks for itself on planned activities. And, we meet first before commitment which makes them feel more comfortable.

Meeting for lunch or coffee never fucking ever goes anywhere. Girls know if they're going to fuck you the second they see you. Give them time and they chicken out or some freaking thing happens.

[Midwestern]

This sounds very much like my MO too. And yeah, casting a wide net is key. Being picky is a waste of time. When I was active on SA, I would send at least half dozen new greetings per day. But you do have to spend some time to read their profiles so that you can write something to stand out. These gals are getting so many messages, so you need to stand out.

Generally, I also want to avoid sex in the first meet. As I said, I am afraid of entrapment (perhaps an irrational fear, but we can't be rational all the time), also a first meet and greet does give a chance to get to know, understand, reflect and if still liking the girl, get back with her. Also, as someone else mentioned, the ones who agree to have sex before even the first meet and greet are more likely professional girls and that is usually not my ideal spec. The genuine student, waitress or bartender, office receptionist or even young single mom types may want to also get to know you before agreeing to fuck. I did have sex on some first dates. But in those situations, we still met for a lunch or dinner, spent some time talking, and we both decided we liked each other enough and went to a room nearby. The agreement happened during the meet, not before the meet.

All of the above is in arrangements that happened in my home city. When I'm on the road, it is a different situation. If you are in a city for only 3 days for business and one of them included a business dinner late into the night, you don't have the luxury of meet and greet and then sex the next day. In those scenarios, I break my rule and go with sex despite my fear of entrapment. We keep the discussion as generic as possible, IE. No mention of sex anywhere in the text messages. But when allowance of a few hundred is discussed, the girl knows sex is on the table. Only one time a girl came to my room and pretended to be shocked that I wanted sex. I said "how did you expect to receive 300 with no sex"?

Anyway, to your question, I think most girls are definitely not wanting to go to a room for the simple reason that 50% or more of "girls" on SA are total scammers and fakes. This is my anecdotal experience. Of the remaining, some are strictly no sex girls, and some have very high expectations in terms of allowance and so on. Again, this is in my sample, which is limited to slim white girls younger than 25 years old. Stats may differ at other age groups, in other cities. The ones who are nice, will have sex at reasonable prices are also careful like we are, and will only have sex after a long discussion, a couple of dates and so on.

As for price negotiation, it is jut about being patient. I hardly ever pay more than 400, try to stay below 300 most of the time if possible; I reach out to many many girls because I feel that if I cast a wide net I may catch what I want at a good price. If I was a single man, I probably would be more flexible but part of my challenge is that I need to keep my expenses low enough so that the missing money is never noticed by my spouse.

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[Pessimist]

Do you have any advice on negotiating on price? SA tells the girl not to go to a room at the meet and greet. Do you find most girls not wanting to go to a hotel on the first meeting? Thanks. Still an amateur.

Generally, I also want to avoid sex in the first meet. As I said, I am afraid of entrapment (perhaps an irrational fear, but we can't be rational all the time), also a first meet and greet does give a chance to get to know, understand, reflect and if still liking the girl, get back with her. Also, as someone else mentioned, the ones who agree to have sex before even the first meet and greet are more likely professional girls and that is usually not my ideal spec. The genuine student, waitress or bartender, office receptionist or even young single mom types may want to also get to know you before agreeing to fuck. I did have sex on some first dates. But in those situations, we still met for a lunch or dinner, spent some time talking, and we both decided we liked each other enough and went to a room nearby. The agreement happened during the meet, not before the meet.

All of the above is in arrangements that happened in my home city. When I'm on the road, it is a different situation. If you are in a city for only 3 days for business and one of them included a business dinner late into the night, you don't have the luxury of meet and greet and then sex the next day. In those scenarios, I break my rule and go with sex despite my fear of entrapment. We keep the discussion as generic as possible, IE. No mention of sex anywhere in the text messages. But when allowance of a few hundred is discussed, the girl knows sex is on the table. Only one time a girl came to my room and pretended to be shocked that I wanted sex. I said "how did you expect to receive 300 with no sex"?

Anyway, to your question, I think most girls are definitely not wanting to go to a room for the simple reason that 50% or more of "girls" on SA are total scammers and fakes. This is my anecdotal experience. Of the remaining, some are strictly no sex girls, and some have very high expectations in terms of allowance and so on. Again, this is in my sample, which is limited to slim white girls younger than 25 years old. Stats may differ at other age groups, in other cities. The ones who are nice, will have sex at reasonable prices are also careful like we are, and will only have sex after a long discussion, a couple of dates and so on.

As for price negotiation, it is jut about being patient. I hardly ever pay more than 400, try to stay below 300 most of the time if possible; I reach out to many many girls because I feel that if I cast a wide net I may catch what I want at a good price. If I was a single man, I probably would be more flexible but part of my challenge is that I need to keep my expenses low enough so that the missing money is never noticed by my spouse.

[Pessimist]

BTW, I also used hushed. I like it. If needed, I can delete the app off my phone and download back. This matters due to my martial status.

I do have my photo uploaded. I keep it private and open it up to girls who asked for it. If you are not careful pretty soon, several dozens of girls have my photo. So, Every few days, I go back to my profile, turn off access to my photo to everyone with one button, and start opening it again when they ask them. I use the same photo as is in my whatsapp and email and phone messaging, so that if ever it comes to it, I can say that particular photo is already in the open domain. But so far, I have been lucky, and worlds have not collided (Seinfeld reference).

[Pessimist]

I'the be curious to know what your home city is..

Yeah, I have to keep it confidential for obvious reasons. Especially as I said I am married and taking a huge risk with all these extracurricular activities. BTW, I have used SA in some bigger cities too, paid 300 to 350 in Boston multiple times and a bit less than that in Chicago. Florida is cheap if you are traveling there, although some girls in Miami demanded a large amount. By far the worst experience has been in San Fran, I never got anyone to accept less than 500 and many demanded 150 to 200 just to have dinner with me. BTW, I always have a dinner or lunch prior to the sex as I want to assess the vibe and due to entrapment fears, I want to get a read on body language through a dinner prior to the meet. Also, I stick to white girls in the 20-25 age group, slim and pretty. Or fair skinned Latinas. If I relax my race, age or body shape criteria, rates may get cheaper I suspect.

[Midwestern]

I'the be curious to know what your home city is.

I have been with SA on and off for 4 years. Mostly on, and when I was off, I tried secret benefits and a couple of other sites but SA has been my best site for a while. I am icky enough to be living in a reasonably priced and yet large enough city with more than a million metropolitan population and much larger if including the greater area in a driving distance of 60 to 80 minutes. Prices have ranged between 200 to 300. Occasionally paid up more if the girl is super hot, but 300 dollars is good enough for even very pretty 20 year old slim white girls. I had the least luck with Asian girls, this area is not full of Asians and they still have the platinum pussy attitude here. Some Latino girls are willing to put out for as low as 150 and some other Latino girls have demanded as much as 1,000 which I thought was crazy talk. White girls are generally reasonable, but every now and then you run into the princess attitude.

The biggest problem is the sheer number of fakers, no sex girls, girls looking for online only arrangements, and many outright scammers. It is a lot of work. But I the end it is all rewarding if you get hold of some good girls. The good news is that over time you build your database. Now I have several dozen girls in my stable so to speak. Sure, some of them change numbers and disappear. But many still answer back.

I am married and have a challenging time in balancing my secretive life on SA, occasional FKK visits with normal married life not to mention the job. I will not give away all my secrets how I do this. But time is as critical as money with these constraints.

On the whole, I am quite satisfied with SA and sugar babe sites in general. It can be an expensive hobby but if you can afford it, with some moderate amount of spending capital, you can have a reasonably OK sex encounters with young pretty girls right here in the US. I have live to tell the tale about this.

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[Akibono]

Both. Mostly at home. As I said in another post, I am lucky enough to live in a reasonably priced city. When I travel to San Fran or NYC, the prices over there are invariably higher, much higher in fact. Why pay $600 for a so so girl when I can have a prettier, younger girl for 300 at home? One advantage is that on the road, if it is a business trip, hotel is already paid for but you can always rent a cheap motel for 50-100 close to where I live.

That said, I have used SA many times when I am on the road.

Do you have any advice on negotiating on price? SA tells the girl not to go to a room at the meet and greet. Do you find most girls not wanting to go to a hotel on the first meeting? Thanks. Still an amateur.

[Pessimist]

Good to learn more about all this. Some more questions from a newbie:

Do y'all mainly use when traveling, or even while at home? If so, do you actually bring the girls back to your place, or get a hotel room for the night? And do you use your real name or phone number? I'm guessing no on the phone at the very least?

I can see this potentially being a fun thing to do when traveling, but I'd get pretty paranoid doing it at home.

Both. Mostly at home. As I said in another post, I am lucky enough to live in a reasonably priced city. When I travel to San Fran or NYC, the prices over there are invariably higher, much higher in fact. Why pay $600 for a so so girl when I can have a prettier, younger girl for 300 at home? One advantage is that on the road, if it is a business trip, hotel is already paid for but you can always rent a cheap motel for 50-100 close to where I live.

That said, I have used SA many times when I am on the road.

[Pessimist]

Let's use this thread to discuss and share SA experiences, tips, advice, etc.

I was on SA for 18 months in the states and had 25 gals. About half were just gals that wanted to enjoy fancy dinners, being spoiled, going on trips, etc. No monetary transaction was ever involved. But other half involved were explicit monetary arrangements. But its a LOT of work.

I have been with SA on and off for 4 years. Mostly on, and when I was off, I tried secret benefits and a couple of other sites but SA has been my best site for a while. I am icky enough to be living in a reasonably priced and yet large enough city with more than a million metropolitan population and much larger if including the greater area in a driving distance of 60 to 80 minutes. Prices have ranged between 200 to 300. Occasionally paid up more if the girl is super hot, but 300 dollars is good enough for even very pretty 20 year old slim white girls. I had the least luck with Asian girls, this area is not full of Asians and they still have the platinum pussy attitude here. Some Latino girls are willing to put out for as low as 150 and some other Latino girls have demanded as much as 1,000 which I thought was crazy talk. White girls are generally reasonable, but every now and then you run into the princess attitude.

The biggest problem is the sheer number of fakers, no sex girls, girls looking for online only arrangements, and many outright scammers. It is a lot of work. But I the end it is all rewarding if you get hold of some good girls. The good news is that over time you build your database. Now I have several dozen girls in my stable so to speak. Sure, some of them change numbers and disappear. But many still answer back.

I am married and have a challenging time in balancing my secretive life on SA, occasional FKK visits with normal married life not to mention the job. I will not give away all my secrets how I do this. But time is as critical as money with these constraints.

On the whole, I am quite satisfied with SA and sugar babe sites in general. It can be an expensive hobby but if you can afford it, with some moderate amount of spending capital, you can have a reasonably OK sex encounters with young pretty girls right here in the US. I have live to tell the tale about this.

[Midwestern]

Good to learn more about all this. Some more questions from a newbie:

Do y'all mainly use when traveling, or even while at home? If so, do you actually bring the girls back to your place, or get a hotel room for the night? And do you use your real name or phone number? I'm guessing no on the phone at the very least?

I can see this potentially being a fun thing to do when traveling, but I'd get pretty paranoid doing it at home.

I mainly used it at home. I tried using it while traveling, but it usually takes too much time (I did get lucky once though, while on a short business trip). At home, I either booked a hotel or used their place. I usually didn't use my real name and I downloaded Hushed for calls and texts. When I say I used it at home, it means nearby city. For example, if you live in Oakland, then find gals living in SF or find undergrads at Berkeley. But you need to ask them where they really live. Almost everyone lies on that site. Gals don't reveal where they really live, but neither did I. For most part, there's little to be paranoid about. They know what they are in for, so there should be no awkwardness if you accidentally run into them. My main concern was that she was a colleague or someone from my personal circle. So I had to ask a bunch of questions to make sure she wasn't.