General Reports

[TomJackin]

Hi Tom, is the busty one from Chicago Club, Playboy or HK? In any case, very nice! Thanks!

Ya, some of the Mexicans must think we're stupid with their upselling.

Both of the busty ones are buddies of mine in HK. If we ever get a chance to meet up, I'd be more than happy to introduce you to both of them. One is a HK day girl and the other works at night, both are awesome.

[D Cups]

Hi Tom, is the busty one from Chicago Club, Playboy or HK? In any case, very nice! Thanks!

Ya, some of the Mexicans must think we're stupid with their upselling.

The peso exchange was 13. 045 in San Ysidro so I stocked up a bit. I wasn't in HK for more than few minutes when a new cutie approached me, sat down, and butchered English. So I did my best and butchered Spanish, but not on purpose, but only because my Spanish still sucks, and we both did one hell of a job butchering both languages; I liked her. Plus she was photogenic. She wanted to show off her new tattoo.

It was a motorcycle / tattoo theme in HK and there were a few hogs set up, not the ones that walk around in LC, but regular Harleys. Once the new girl left, one of my favorites was swarming and watching, and then she saw her chance to swoop in for a drink, no worries, she played for the camera and was quite affectionate in the booth as well. My mesero made the ultimate mistake and left a bag of chips on my table. I launched them fuckers from the upper section to the lower section! They landed next to one of the hogs; he had a hell of a time retrieving them. Pic included.

Met up with Woodster (TJA) and his buddy in HK, stayed there a bit, and then moved on to Playboy. I admit Playboy has not been my cup of tea, but I decided to give it another try with Woodster and pal. Woodster and his friend hooked up right away and I decided to stay solo, because they had the only good looking girls already. The mesero returned with my screwdriver and told me it was $7. 00. Yep, I got pissed! I said,"There is no way in hell I'm going to pay 7 fucking dollars for a damn screwdriver, so you now have a couple of options, you can take the drink back, OR, you can go ask the bartender, the manager, or God, what is the real fucking price of this drink. He returned and said it was only 2 bucks.

The mesero swore up and down that I needed a girl to sit with. So one by one, he kept bringing them to me for my approval; each time I sent them packing, but at least with a dollar tip because I did check out the goodies. I was about to move on and out when he brought over this last girl. Tall, dark, and quite pretty. I asked him,"Where did you get her from, Hong Kong?" I told him, no thanks, but on my way out the door, she was sitting at the bar and gave me a big beautiful smile as I passed by. God Dammit! OK, just one drink! We chatted and exchanged numbers; another gal for the Tijuana bucket list.

I had a date lined up at Chicago Club, but she was a no show, so I bounced around and chatted with as many girls as physically and mentally possible. I ran into one, who I met before that gave me a great booth massage, and she speaks English to boot, but she is a bit older. She wanted to do a three some with this decent looking younger gal, but not much younger. I got them down to $120, for an hour, and it included the room. But she was acting like a used car salesperson and I deleted her from the three some. Then she got pissed and said,"This is a business and that's all." I replied,"I agree, but you don't have to act like it." Then I said,"For example, just how many business clients do you have each day? While your friend here is rubbing my cock and will get my business, you on the other hand only speak of dollars, so apparently you need to take a "Customer Service" class at a community college so you can figure things the fuck out." I spent a great hour with her friend.

I got a couple of toe shots for you toe freaks; I'm here to help.

[TomJackin]

The peso exchange was 13. 045 in San Ysidro so I stocked up a bit. I wasn't in HK for more than few minutes when a new cutie approached me, sat down, and butchered English. So I did my best and butchered Spanish, but not on purpose, but only because my Spanish still sucks, and we both did one hell of a job butchering both languages; I liked her. Plus she was photogenic. She wanted to show off her new tattoo.

It was a motorcycle / tattoo theme in HK and there were a few hogs set up, not the ones that walk around in LC, but regular Harleys. Once the new girl left, one of my favorites was swarming and watching, and then she saw her chance to swoop in for a drink, no worries, she played for the camera and was quite affectionate in the booth as well. My mesero made the ultimate mistake and left a bag of chips on my table. I launched them fuckers from the upper section to the lower section! They landed next to one of the hogs; he had a hell of a time retrieving them. Pic included.

Met up with Woodster (TJA) and his buddy in HK, stayed there a bit, and then moved on to Playboy. I admit Playboy has not been my cup of tea, but I decided to give it another try with Woodster and pal. Woodster and his friend hooked up right away and I decided to stay solo, because they had the only good looking girls already. The mesero returned with my screwdriver and told me it was $7. 00. Yep, I got pissed! I said,"There is no way in hell I'm going to pay 7 fucking dollars for a damn screwdriver, so you now have a couple of options, you can take the drink back, OR, you can go ask the bartender, the manager, or God, what is the real fucking price of this drink. He returned and said it was only 2 bucks.

The mesero swore up and down that I needed a girl to sit with. So one by one, he kept bringing them to me for my approval; each time I sent them packing, but at least with a dollar tip because I did check out the goodies. I was about to move on and out when he brought over this last girl. Tall, dark, and quite pretty. I asked him,"Where did you get her from, Hong Kong?" I told him, no thanks, but on my way out the door, she was sitting at the bar and gave me a big beautiful smile as I passed by. God Dammit! OK, just one drink! We chatted and exchanged numbers; another gal for the Tijuana bucket list.

I had a date lined up at Chicago Club, but she was a no show, so I bounced around and chatted with as many girls as physically and mentally possible. I ran into one, who I met before that gave me a great booth massage, and she speaks English to boot, but she is a bit older. She wanted to do a three some with this decent looking younger gal, but not much younger. I got them down to $120, for an hour, and it included the room. But she was acting like a used car salesperson and I deleted her from the three some. Then she got pissed and said,"This is a business and that's all." I replied,"I agree, but you don't have to act like it." Then I said,"For example, just how many business clients do you have each day? While your friend here is rubbing my cock and will get my business, you on the other hand only speak of dollars, so apparently you need to take a "Customer Service" class at a community college so you can figure things the fuck out." I spent a great hour with her friend.

I got a couple of toe shots for you toe freaks; I'm here to help.

[Derekj6926]

great report, one day i must introduce myself to you when i see you and shake the hand of the man who can do tiquila shots down her ass at no charge to the lady! got to luv it!

started out the afternoon by picking up artisttyp at his hotel via taxi and headed to plaza rio mall so i could get my own tijuana phone number. for christ's sake, i'm down there enough, so why not. artisttyp led the way to some phone shop in the back of the mall, and for 150 pesos, the pretty lady installed the sim card in one of my unlocked travel phones, and activated the card as well. i was told that as long as i added minutes to it every now and then, i would always keep the same number. yep, i did try to get the pretty lady's phone number as well, but the moon and stars were not aligned to allow that to happen.

headed to hk and then planted my old ass in a booth. there were quite a few new girls in the place; some better looking than others, of course. but still, a very nice addition. after watching sharon dance on both stages, i came to a semi conclusion. i think that girl has the hottest and hardest body in the zona, imho. after tipping her on the back stage, i returned to my booth. as freddy was leaving the area, he asked,"so what, are you going to chill with sharon for a while?" i gave him my best,"are you out of your fucking mind" looks, and said,"sure, i would love to pay another 8 fucking dollars for a tasty plastic cup of ice water for her!" he had a good laugh and walked away.

i was looking for a different booth playmate, but as time went by, i did not see any fun candidates. thus, i was sinking into a deep depression. just about the time i was about to slit my wrists, i looked up and there she was with a million dollar smile, or more like a thousand peso smile. nevertheless, she seemed worth a try. as soon as she came over to the booth, she looked at me dead in the eyes, and dropped her panties to her knee caps! lord have mercy! i just met my next wife! she sat down and played like a champ, no restrictions at all. she told me both her bar name and real name, but it only took less than ten minutes to forget both of them.

what i do remember is that she love the camera and attention. speedy came by and decided that an ass crack tequila shot would be more than appropriate, so i agreed. i will admit, there was quite a bite to that shot, more than i expected, but i'm a big boy; no worries. the only thing that i did not like about "what's her name" was she drank a bit too fast for my taste. so after a couple of drinks and a dozen of pictures, i sent her packing, which confused her. btw, i took a shot for you foot fetish dudes, you know who you are. i did see her a bit later, and she pulled me aside and asked,"don't you want to fuck me?" i replied,"oh yes, but not today, tonight is street girl night." which seemed to confuse her even more.

headed out to the alley and started looking for one of my favorites, but they were either busy or not there. btw, last week artisttyp were trolling for some nasty street girls when this nice dude came up to us and told us that his club, christian, had a special, two beers and two tequilas for 3 bucks. i said what the fuck, let's go. well i thought it was either, two beers for 3 bucks, or two tequilas for 3 bucks. but to our surprise, it was all for 3 bucks! there was only one spinner in the place, but i thought it was good to check the place out anyway. the highlight was the spinner dancing with one of the other girls and she was wearing one of those tight short dresses that kept rising over her ass cheeks while she danced. she tried like hell to keep pulling the dress down, but because god was in my corner that night; the dress kept rising!

i circled the wagon (blocks) a few times before i saw one of my favorites. went to the store to stock up and then off to the 5 star shitty hour hotel; but it's all good. my girl has a belly that looks like a shipwreck, not like the titanic, but pretty damn close. but i'd be damned if she doesn't have the wackiest, cutest socks in the zona! i almost wanted to shoot my load on them, but it was a lot warmer to unload inside her; tough choices, huh?

the rest of the evening i bounced through hk, lc, ab, and cc, but spent the bulk of time in hk. ab had some seriously fine asses standing around, but just doing that, standing around. one day i will try a ab girl, when i get the time. lc had a few great looking, non big girls, but they were tied up. cc at least had dancers that rotated on the large stage, and then added a second dancer on the back stage.

i'm not sure why i continue to park in a $5 for 8 hours lot when i have not been able to get out of tijuana in less than 9 hours during the last several trips, but dammit, i won't give up.

[DeepMmpactt]

I like you Tom, Not afraid to get you hands dirty or NOSE for that !.matter, you dive right in there and wash everything down with a little tequila. No smells, no fear and it doubles as a potent antiseptic. Jajajajaajajajaja LOL

Miami HeatLuver I agree, this a great accurrate post, Tom is 'Legend Of The Face In Ass Shots" I guess that makes him a Ass-In-Face-O-Logist. LOL. And I'm The Number 1 Feet Fetish Wierdo. So Thanks Tom for those great toe shott. I can't wait to go to Tijuanna for the first time. So DeepMmpactt invades Tijuanna, I'm taking no prisioners. LOL!

[Ready Ru]

Love your reports man! Sorry I missed meeting you in Managua. Mabey in Tijuana some day

[MiamiHeatLuver]

I'm not sure why I continue to park in a $5 for 8 hours lot when I have not been able to get out of Tijuana in less than 9 hours during the last several trips, but dammit, I won't give up.

I like you Tom, Not afraid to get you hands dirty or NOSE for that matter, you dive right in there and wash everything down with a little tequila. No smells, no fear and it doubles as a potent antiseptic. Jajajajaajajajaja LOL

[TomJackin]

started out the afternoon by picking up artisttyp at his hotel via taxi and headed to plaza rio mall so i could get my own tijuana phone number. for christ's sake, i'm down there enough, so why not. artisttyp led the way to some phone shop in the back of the mall, and for 150 pesos, the pretty lady installed the sim card in one of my unlocked travel phones, and activated the card as well. i was told that as long as i added minutes to it every now and then, i would always keep the same number. yep, i did try to get the pretty lady's phone number as well, but the moon and stars were not aligned to allow that to happen.

headed to hk and then planted my old ass in a booth. there were quite a few new girls in the place; some better looking than others, of course. but still, a very nice addition. after watching sharon dance on both stages, i came to a semi conclusion. i think that girl has the hottest and hardest body in the zona, imho. after tipping her on the back stage, i returned to my booth. as freddy was leaving the area, he asked,"so what, are you going to chill with sharon for a while?" i gave him my best,"are you out of your fucking mind" looks, and said,"sure, i would love to pay another 8 fucking dollars for a tasty plastic cup of ice water for her!" he had a good laugh and walked away.

i was looking for a different booth playmate, but as time went by, i did not see any fun candidates. thus, i was sinking into a deep depression. just about the time i was about to slit my wrists, i looked up and there she was with a million dollar smile, or more like a thousand peso smile. nevertheless, she seemed worth a try. as soon as she came over to the booth, she looked at me dead in the eyes, and dropped her panties to her knee caps! lord have mercy! i just met my next wife! she sat down and played like a champ, no restrictions at all. she told me both her bar name and real name, but it only took less than ten minutes to forget both of them.

what i do remember is that she love the camera and attention. speedy came by and decided that an ass crack tequila shot would be more than appropriate, so i agreed. i will admit, there was quite a bite to that shot, more than i expected, but i'm a big boy; no worries. the only thing that i did not like about "what's her name" was she drank a bit too fast for my taste. so after a couple of drinks and a dozen of pictures, i sent her packing, which confused her. btw, i took a shot for you foot fetish dudes, you know who you are. i did see her a bit later, and she pulled me aside and asked,"don't you want to fuck me?" i replied,"oh yes, but not today, tonight is street girl night." which seemed to confuse her even more.

headed out to the alley and started looking for one of my favorites, but they were either busy or not there. btw, last week artisttyp were trolling for some nasty street girls when this nice dude came up to us and told us that his club, christian, had a special, two beers and two tequilas for 3 bucks. i said what the fuck, let's go. well i thought it was either, two beers for 3 bucks, or two tequilas for 3 bucks. but to our surprise, it was all for 3 bucks! there was only one spinner in the place, but i thought it was good to check the place out anyway. the highlight was the spinner dancing with one of the other girls and she was wearing one of those tight short dresses that kept rising over her ass cheeks while she danced. she tried like hell to keep pulling the dress down, but because god was in my corner that night; the dress kept rising!

i circled the wagon (blocks) a few times before i saw one of my favorites. went to the store to stock up and then off to the 5 star shitty hour hotel; but it's all good. my girl has a belly that looks like a shipwreck, not like the titanic, but pretty damn close. but i'd be damned if she doesn't have the wackiest, cutest socks in the zona! i almost wanted to shoot my load on them, but it was a lot warmer to unload inside her; tough choices, huh?

the rest of the evening i bounced through hk, lc, ab, and cc, but spent the bulk of time in hk. ab had some seriously fine asses standing around, but just doing that, standing around. one day i will try a ab girl, when i get the time. lc had a few great looking, non big girls, but they were tied up. cc at least had dancers that rotated on the large stage, and then added a second dancer on the back stage.

i'm not sure why i continue to park in a $5 for 8 hours lot when i have not been able to get out of tijuana in less than 9 hours during the last several trips, but dammit, i won't give up.

[Travel Addict]

Anyone asking is XYZ is legal in Mexico is asking the wrong question.

The question is if the cops put the cuffs on you and tell you there is a $500 fine or they will put you in a cell until the judge can see you tomorrow, are you going to whip out your Mexican law books and argue. With them? NOOOO. As stated below, you are going to shit your pants, go to the ATM and pay them. Most Mexican cops have never read a law book. Do not carry ANY pills powders drugs pocket knives or get into any altercations in the zona. You have no rights, PERIOD.

[Artisttyp]

The marijuana bar you speak of is trouble. I've seen the cops raid that place several times. It is not amsterdam. Wrong impression. Only careless users would smoke there. You might get away with it a few times but don't forget to say hello to the cop who stands right outside on the corner.

Lots of bad advice if you ask me. If you do it in Tijuana keep it to yourself.

I smelled it on the streets recently being smoked by *street people who have nothing to lose. If that is where you want to fit in cool. For those of us wise enough to realize we arent zona rats and actually value our freedom or the money in our pocket eat a brownie before you cross.

[Joe Arturo]

oh for christ's sake, there is a marijuana bar 2 blocks from adelitas, where everyone is smoking pot.

about 1/4 of the club girls are potheads, i know because they call me on their days off and go with me. ditto some for the cops from the zona, we go out and have beers and 420 and they brag to me how they got $400 out of some fuckwit gringo, while they are smoking the pot they "confirep001ed" from him, and laughing how the gringo shit his pants as soon as they showed him the handcuffs.

you can get an 1/8 oz anywhere in the zona for $5. but if you don't speak spanish and know what you are doing, you will end up getting ass-fucked by the cops. not because of the "law" but because they know you are a girlie-man who will start crying and give them all your money as soon as they say "boo" to you!

regardless of what the "law" says. i have read the drug laws, in spanish, but it is irrelevant, if you are a fuckwit who speaks no spanish and you are caught with mj in the zona, they will lock you up for a few minutes, you will shit your pants, and you will give them every penny you have or can get ahold of, and then come on here crying about how you were "hassled" by the cops. meanwhile they are smoking the pot they took from you, taking the viagra they took from you, partying with the money they took from you, and banging your "novia" for free, and bragging about it to me.

and for you guys who think you have "girlfriends" in the zona, ask her to spend her day off with you without payment

and report back to me. i have taken maybe 30 girls from the zona out to the movies, met their moms, etc. some of them have traveled with me for no payment.

it is always amazing to me that the least knowledgeable weekend warriors come on here to argue about who knows more about what.

i am going to veracruz next month with 2 of my gfe's from the zona, they cook for me, go out with me, and charge me zero, introduce me to their parents, etc.

so which one of you tijuana "experts" has a "girlfriend" who will go for a weeks vacation with you for no money, pm me and we can go together!

what, no takers from the "experts" with their novias? gee i thought so.

meanwhile, keep arguing with each other about who knows more about the zona lol.

(for anyone who knows the zona for real, relax i am not talking to you, so don't bother flaming me)

siempre quice a irme para vera cruz. cuando vamos a ir? vamos en avion o camion o en mi carro? puedo llevar una o dos chicas conmigo? no tengo novia porque amor es muy pendejo!

[Rabo Verde]

oh for christ's sake, there is a marijuana bar 2 blocks from adelitas, where everyone is smoking pot.

about 1/4 of the club girls are potheads, i know because they call me on their days off and go with me.ditto some for the cops from the zona, we go out and have beers and 420 and they brag to me how they got $400 out of some fuckwit gringo, while they are smoking the pot they "confirep001ed" from him, and laughing how the gringo shit his pants as soon as they showed him the handcuffs.

you can get an 1/8 oz anywhere in the zona for $5. but if you don't speak spanish and know what you are doing, you will end up getting ass-fucked by the cops. not because of the "law" but because they know you are a girlie-man who will start crying and give them all your money as soon as they say "boo" to you!

regardless of what the "law" says. i have read the drug laws, in spanish, but it is irrelevant, if you are a fuckwit who speaks no spanish and you are caught with mj in the zona, they will lock you up for a few minutes, you will shit your pants, and you will give them every penny you have or can get ahold of, and then come on here crying about how you were "hassled" by the cops. meanwhile they are smoking the pot they took from you, taking the viagra they took from you, partying with the money they took from you, and banging your "novia" for free, and bragging about it to me.

and for you guys who think you have "girlfriends" in the zona, ask her to spend her day off with you without payment
and report back to me. i have taken maybe 30 girls from the zona out to the movies, met their moms, etc. some of them have traveled with me for no payment.

it is always amazing to me that the least knowledgeable weekend warriors come on here to argue about who knows more about what.

i am going to veracruz next month with 2 of my gfe's from the zona, they cook for me, go out with me, and charge me zero, introduce me to their parents, etc.
so which one of you tijuana "experts" has a "girlfriend" who will go for a weeks vacation with you for no money, pm me and we can go together!
what, no takers from the "experts" with their novias? gee i thought so.

meanwhile, keep arguing with each other about who knows more about the zona lol
(for anyone who knows the zona for real, relax i am not talking to you, so don't bother flaming me)

[JimmyKienTran]

About returning to Tijuana is that I had such a great time on two separate evenings that I am not sure it could happen again! Have had some good times and some times that were like "Well, it was only 60 bucks". Last two trips were mellow and fun and the ladies were quite beautiful and friendly. Very nice! Now, I like to get there in the afternoons and get out by dark, not walk too far, and don't smoke a doobie on the corner. I have never been hassled nor felt threatened. Headed back in a month or so and will see how it goes. I am sure I will have a nice time.

Thanks to the lovely chicas of Tijuana.

Sound good simon. But don't you wish we can smoke a doobie while we are in Tijuana? That would enhance my sex performance LOL.

[JimmyKienTran]

There are a few good things about us "old farts." That would be experience, wisdom, and knowledge.

Phordphan gave you solid advice, as well as telling you what bar that will support your need. When I walk by the place, almost every week, I smell the weed coming from the place. You should thank him for the information.

So at this point, you have a couple of choices: You can either listen and learn from the experience of others OR you could just ignore us "old farts" and dive in and take your chances. Good luck either way.

Thanks For the Info Tom, Phordphan, and other in this Forum, Iam sorry about the comment.

[Dos Lunas]

Nice trip report.

I can see where the misconnect could have happened:

First, I haven't seen you in almost two years, so I'm sure we forgot what each other looked like. I was in HK from 8 until at least 9:30/10.

Second, I'm sure we were both preoccupied with all the fine ass in HK that we forgot we were suppose to meet in the first place, at least on my tired old brain's part.

Third, if it was close to 9 or 10, it was already past my bedtime, so I could have been taking a nappie in one of the booths OR could have had an ass sitting on my face when you walked by.

Sorry I missed you!

Ha ha, you're probably right. I too had my face implanted on tits and ass when you walked by as well. See you next time buddy.