Medellin Reports

[Jiniterinator]

Hola amigos,

Regular poster in the Havana thread, going to try out Colombia in June. I've read the thread back 6 months and chatted with some people who've gone. My only issues are logistical. Some great recommendations here on dinero and restaurants and strip clubs.

My main concerns:

1) Where to stay (my preference on my first trip is to stay in Poblado, K. I. S. S.) for chica-friendliness. Some say hotels are better, others say certain AirBNBs (which is my typical lodging). I know the AirBNB drill, ask the hosts, and read the reviews, same as any city. But if there are hotels that are renowned for their chica hospitality, then maybe I can bypass the rigamarole of AirBNB research and host interviews. It REALLY raises my anxiety dropping the time and money on a trip and not even knowing if I am going to be able to take a chica home (not interested in the love hotels, I like home court advantage). Assume money is not a consideration.

2) Which city to fly into? Many experienced Colombia guys have different views on which airport to take and not be in immigration for 4 hours (I am ADD / type A and waiting in line is painful). I want to go to Medellin, but is it really better to fly into CTG (I'm already researching Cartagena chicas). Some say yes, some say BOG (frankly I'm a little scared of Bogota on my first trip), others say all the airports suck, so just redeye it and get there first (I'd prefer not to start my vacay with jet lag, as I'm no spring chicken). I don't mind flying into one city from the US, then hopping to another in Colombia, and flying back to the US from it, if that is more better than wasting 4 hours at MDE.

3) Is June a good month to go? Being equatorial I wouldn't think the time of year would matter, but it seems to be raining a lot there now. Rain kind of buzzkills strolling in Lleras park, eh?

Also, many references to "casas" here, which seems to be either bordellos or clubs that act that way?

TIA guys. I promise to reciprocate with a detailed report upon my return.

[Mr Enternational]

I live in Manizales and generally the food here sucks but there are a handful of decent restaurants but it took a lot of research and trial and error to get a decent roster of restaurants. That said, everything else about this city blows away the big three cities, especially the chicas.

I agree. Manizales is one beautiful place and I found some great food there. Those hills can go to hell, but I guess that is what makes it so beautiful.

[Manizales911]

Propane barbecue is pretend barbecue. But seriously, the longer you are here the more you realize how bad Colombian gastronomy is. Their favorite flavor is bland and their only seasoning is salt, sugar, grease, and cilantro. You can work around it in the big cities where there are international restaurants and specialty grocery chains like Carulla. In the pueblos and smaller cities it is grim. I was in Ibagu last week. I couldn't even find a decent pastel de pollo. One morning I was in a local bakery and everybody was eating calentado. I reverted to fruit and steamed vegetables.

You're right. I live in Manizales and generally the food here sucks but there are a handful of decent restaurants but it took a lot of research and trial and error to get a decent roster of restaurants. That said, everything else about this city blows away the big three cities, especially the chicas. Tonight I'm taking a "9" chica to a Mexican restaurant owned by a Mexican family, the chica is the one that found this one, the restaurant has great reviews, we'll see.

[Degenerate24]

You can buy tadalafil and sex toys here. These guys have had their luggage inspected after they were unable to provide satisfactory responses to questions along the lines of "what is the purpose of your visit to Colombia?" It's a good idea to be able to name an attraction or two. You should also be able to indicate where you will be staying and it's better if the address you give is not one of the better known punter clubhouses.

That is the smartest move, but you are not getting the smartest mongers in MDE. They can book tons of attractions and cancel them if they don't feel like doing any tourism. A coffee tour for example. The easiest is to find a local girlfriend or buddy and provide her or his info.

[Combo]

Immigration officials in any country can deny you because they don't like the look on your face, no reason necessary. Colombia is tired of these Youtube idiots.

That's pretty much it. You're visiting at their pleasure.

[World Travel 69]

I just was updating the maps. A lot of places have are outdated.

Please let us know about those places. Free map if you do!

[Mr Enternational]

Why is that? Sex toys are legal, prostitution is legal.

If one goes to Colombia multiple times within a short time span, clean phone, no sex toys, just Tadalafil, and what he is doing is 100% legal there as well as in his country. Do he need to prepare and worry?

Legal? Hilarious. It is not about legality. What Manizales said is spot on. You can be granted a visa at an embassy and when you get to a country immigration can deny you entry.

[Manizales911]

Why is that? Sex toys are legal, prostitution is legal.

If one goes to Colombia multiple times within a short time span, clean phone, no sex toys, just Tadalafil, and what he is doing is 100% legal there as well as in his country. Do he need to prepare and worry?

Immigration officials in any country can deny you because they don't like the look on your face, no reason necessary. Colombia is tired of these Youtube idiots.

[Knowledge]

Propane barbecue is pretend barbecue. But seriously, the longer you are here the more you realize how bad Colombian gastronomy is. Their favorite flavor is bland and their only seasoning is salt, sugar, grease, and cilantro. You can work around it in the big cities where there are international restaurants and specialty grocery chains like Carulla. In the pueblos and smaller cities it is grim. I was in Ibagué last week. I couldn't even find a decent pastel de pollo. One morning I was in a local bakery and everybody was eating calentado. I reverted to fruit and steamed vegetables.

Today was an exceptional day. I cooked five racks of ribs, potato salad, baked beans, a garden salad, and some Southern hoe cakes. Everyone at my house was absolutely in love with how the ribs turned out! That's what I mean about having specific condiments and adding those little American touches that make everything taste like home.

​Once you prepare food in this country, you realize the difference. I shipped down a gas grill, bought a small propane tank, and brought in wood chips so I'd still have that hickory smell. Between the chips and the authentic mesquite rub, the food turned out absolutely wonderful. I had about 12 guests over, and they couldn't stop talking about it. Some of them are even taking plates home! Five racks of ribs is a lot of food, and the way they were preparedright down to the thin endswas just on point. PN.

[Knowledge]

You can buy tadalafil and sex toys here. These guys have had their luggage inspected after they were unable to provide satisfactory responses to questions along the lines of "what is the purpose of your visit to Colombia?" It's a good idea to be able to name an attraction or two. You should also be able to indicate where you will be staying and it's better if the address you give is not one of the better known punter clubhouses.

Why is that? Sex toys are legal, prostitution is legal.

If one goes to Colombia multiple times within a short time span, clean phone, no sex toys, just Tadalafil, and what he is doing is 100% legal there as well as in his country. Do he need to prepare and worry?

[PSAddict]

I saw this on Fay Boo and I tried to find a matching story by googling this lead line but I could not find anything. Anybody else heard about this?

It says: ....."German inadmitted by Migration Colombia after demonstrating intention of tourism for sexual exploitation.

Inconsistencies during the migration interview, itineraries to Cartagena and Medellin and sex toys in their luggage prompted the measure. ".

https://www.facebook.com/MigracionCol

Why is that? Sex toys are legal, prostitution is legal.

If one goes to Colombia multiple times within a short time span, clean phone, no sex toys, just Tadalafil, and what he is doing is 100% legal there as well as in his country. Do he need to prepare and worry?

[Mojo Bandit]

One of my biggest hang ups about Colombia used to be the condiments. Is it too much to have A1 Syrup Hoecakes &A ton of eggs daily for breakfast? PN.

Have you ever been inside a Carulla grocery store they cater a lot to expats, and they have a lot of stuff imported from USA. I know for sure they have the Aunt Jemima pancake mix and pancake syrup, they even have beef steaks important in the United States. I'm not sure where they all are in Medellin but there's two in El poblado and one in Laureles that I know. I attached some small Snips of the map you can see.

[PolloNegro]

Today was an exceptional day. I cooked five racks of ribs, potato salad, baked beans, a garden salad, and some Southern hoe cakes. Everyone at my house was absolutely in love with how the ribs turned out! That's what I mean about having specific condiments and adding those little American touches that make everything taste like home.

​Once you prepare food in this country, you realize the difference. I shipped down a gas grill, bought a small propane tank, and brought in wood chips so I'd still have that hickory smell. Between the chips and the authentic mesquite rub, the food turned out absolutely wonderful. I had about 12 guests over, and they couldn't stop talking about it. Some of them are even taking plates home! Five racks of ribs is a lot of food, and the way they were prepared—right down to the thin ends—was just on point. PN.

[Mr Enternational]

I had a laugh recently when I saw comments on Instagram between two Colombian women who were clowning the expelled foreigner for his awful taste in lingerie.

That just goes to sbow. He probably had in his head that the girls are really going to love this.

[Orgasmico]

This is all just alarmism for clickbait. Don't spread it.

Thanks for confirming. I wasn't going to click anyway.